How Good You Get with Women is Predetermined (Sorta)
Before I delve into my thoughts on women and dating, let me indulge my other favorite topic: financial success. See, as someone who’s been making a living on the internet for three-and-a-half years, I have a lot of people ask me to show them how to do it, too.
And as I sat down to write this article I realized a sad truth: not one of those people has succeeded. Now, it damn well be because I’m a sucky teacher, though, after consulting with my fellow internet entrepreneurs who also report similar dismal statistics, I can only draw one conclusion: most people have sucky habits.
Sucky habits transverse everything: making money online, meeting and attracting women, learning an instrument, succeeding in life. Most people only like the idea of these things, but would rather maintain their sucky habits than ever actually master anything.
Let’s pretend you’d asked me how to succeed at meeting women or internet marketing or writing or any other skill where I may be of assistance. Would you be like the many who roll their eyes when I tell you to unplug your television, to shift your thinking from “wanting to be entertained” to “wanting to be educated?”
Would you cringe when I start lecturing you on the foods you put into your body, explain that your success or failure is largely dictated by the choices you make 5 minutes after you get out of bed in the morning?
Probably you’d want to ask, “Okay, okay, all that stuff is nice…but just SHOW ME HOW TO DO IT!” To you, this makes perfect sense, right? You asked about a specific skill and here I am giving you generic life advice that doesn’t even seem relevant. That’s your perspective…
…here’s mine. To me, whenever someone asks me specifically how to make money online, what to do with a certain girl in a certain situation, etc., I realize I’m dealing with someone who doesn’t understand success. That’s because people who have achieved any sort of mastery in anything know that it isn’t about learning the specifics…it’s about learning the habits.
I hate to sound elitist, but that’s why successful people keep begetting more success, and losers just become bigger losers. Productive habits translate from one discipline to the next. If you learned how to become successful with women then it’s a no-brainer that you can learn to be financially successful, too. The process is so similar it’s almost eerie.
Yet most “poor” people want to believe there’s a magic button online that they can press to make money dispense out of their laptops. On the same token, most “unattractive” guys believe that there’s some magic formula (whether it’s looks, money, a pickup line, hypnosis, etc.) that will make naked girls appear at their bedpost. And so whenever people get frustrated with me, and scream, “Enough with the lectures on waking up early…Just show me how to do it!” I know I’m dealing with one of those unsuccessful people.
When I second-guess myself, and my ability to teach others (any good teacher does…it’s called “being objective), I remind myself of how many failures I’ve known in my life. It may sound harsh (and again, somewhat elitist) but most of the people I’ve met are failures. Sure, they have jobs and they’ve gotten laid and they seem like perfectly decent people. But they’ve long ago laid down their dreams and passions on the alter of mediocrity, happy to sacrifice their greatness for some mindless television shows and a comfortable life.
Indeed, the habits of success aren’t necessarily the most fun or comfortable ways to spend your time. It means sacrificing a lot of what feels good in the moment to ensure being great in the future. And most people can’t handle that. So most people are failures. As such, it’s not my shortcomings as a teacher to teach these people; it’s their unsuccessful habits that made them impossible to teach.
Unfortunately, you, reader, too, are probably a failure. I don’t say that because I specifically know you, but simply because it makes sense from a statistical vantage point. Most people just don’t understand what means to be successful. And so much of your dating success, financial freedom, and lifestyle have already been dictated to you.
Unless of course, you’re willing to unlearn your old habits, and replace them with some new ones.
About Rob Judge Rob J. is a writer and dating instructor in Scottsdate. Themes that resonate in both his teaching and writing are masculinity, genuineness, rational self-interest, and general awesomeness. Get Coaching with Rob: https://www.tsbmag.com/private-coaching-with-rob-judge/