Attraction Cheat Code: Give Her “the Experience”
Let’s begin with a formula: her “perfect” guy < her perfect experience.
Got that? If that sounds too simple or obvious to you, then you don’t completely grasp the idea. That’s because almost every guy thinks a girl wants the “perfect guy,” and they give little thought to giving her the (more important) “perfect experience.”
By “perfect guy” I mean the usual: good looks, popularity, money, etc. Just think of whatever recently psyched you out or stopped you for trying for a girl you were attracted to. To be more specific, let’s look at something that has stopped me in the past: “I’m too short for her.”
Believe it or not, there was a time my 5”8 self stopped short (pun intended) of approaching any girl my height or above. So if I saw some gorgeous 5”10 lady strolling down the street, I’d shy away from the approach convinced she’d “only like guys who are taller than her.”
With age and experience I realized the sheer ridiculousness of that thought. If you can give a woman “the experience” she wants then she will overlook almost any flaw. But since very few guys ever consider “the experience,” psychical flaws and personal shortcomings is what most dudes get fixated on.
By “the experience” I mean this: the way a woman envisions herself being seduced. What makes that hard to decipher is that every woman is different; what makes it easy, however, is that she will give you “clues” into that vision. If you pay attention to what a woman says, understand how to read subtext, and are on the lookout, often you glimpse of the experience women want.
Admittedly, this is much easier to do with a woman who’s in your social circle or you have some time to get to know. A goldmine for sleuthing clues into the experience a woman wants is social media. Often women will post things on their Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc. that give huge insights into the way she wants to be seduced.
For example, if a girl constantly takes pictures of plates of food and bitches how “dates aren’t about going out anymore,” you know this girl probably envisions her “perfect experience” as going out to a romantic, candlelit dinner. Also, study her taste in movies and television. A girl who likes a lot of comedies will probably enjoy a different seductive experience from a girl who likes indie films.
Another glaring clue is noticing what a girl does to stand out. If you’re at a party where everyone is drinking beer but the girl you like is drinking a glass of chardonnay, that’s a big clue. For a girl to do specifically seek out a glass of wine when it’d be so much easier for her to just drink a beer like everyone, else says a lot. Lucky for us, to most guys, it says nothing.
The more you look for clues, the more they will appear to you. Even just noticing the way a woman’s dressed. If you’re trying to seduce a girl who likes to rock sweatpants and tank tops, you shouldn’t give her the same experience as a girl who always is dressed to the nines. Every decision a woman makes provides insight into her character, which is a blueprint to the experience she wants when a man seduces her.
While it may be ethically unsound to say so, this is how to steal a girl from another guy. In most relationships—especially long-term relationships—the guy has often stopped giving his girl the experience that initially seduced her. If another guy comes along and gives her that experience again, it’s often what makes her choose that guy over her boyfriend or former love interest.
To end with a caveat, giving a woman “the experience” she wants doesn’t mean supplicating or trying to be something you’re not. You absolutely should always assert your personality and masculinity at all times. However, you should structure things in a way that caters to the way a woman wants to be seduced.
Most guys seduce women either the way they THINK women (notice, plural) want to be seduced (which is usually wrong and so ineffective) or without giving any thought to it at all. Every girl is different and so you every experience you give a woman should be different. Now that you know what to look for, give her what she REALLY wants and your love interests will thank you in very rewarding ways.
>>>To Learn More From Rob, Check Out “The 4 Elements of Game” where he breaks down game into four simple adjustments.
About Rob Judge Rob J. is a writer and dating instructor in Scottsdate. Themes that resonate in both his teaching and writing are masculinity, genuineness, rational self-interest, and general awesomeness. Get Coaching with Rob: https://www.tsbmag.com/private-coaching-with-rob-judge/