The Secret Things She’s Anxious About on a Second Date
By the second date, her worries about if you’ll get along have disappeared. However, on the inside she is not as cool as she seems. The second date brings a whole new set of anxieties.
It is likely that you paid on the first date. For a first date, that is perfectly fine as it can be seen as a one-off occurrence. However, the second date can be tricky because this is where you set the precedent for any future dates. If you paid last time, she may wonder if you expect her to pay this time in order for it to be fair. She is likely to be worried about the awkwardness of discussing who pays, regardless of the outcome. Unfortunately, this is not something you can discuss in advance without making this even more awkward. To some degree this is a cultural thing, and women from certain places will not worry about what will happen when the bill comes because they expect you to pay it. Whatever happens, make sure you have cash on you so that it is less of an ordeal in the event you split the bill.
On the first date, sex is expected. If it happens, that’s great (unless it wasn’t!); but usually women will resist the impulse to bed you on that first night. There is no rule for how many dates are appropriate before sleeping together, and it really is a personal thing. If she would prefer to wait longer than the second date, she is going to spend the whole night hoping you aren’t expecting much from her.
Women spend forever getting ready for dates. She did not just take four hours painting on makeup and plucking every hair from her body, only to have her efforts ruined by a stray piece of parsley stuck between her teeth. However, she also does not want to make constant bathroom trips to check on her appearance. As a result, she spends much of the date trying to catch her reflection in the spoon to check if her eyeliner has stayed put. This is a particular problem for food dates, as food can be messy, and sitting down listening to you talk gives her plenty of time to worry about her appearance.
You spent the first date getting to know each other, asking predictable questions about jobs and hobbies. You need to get more creative on date number two. Unless you had a roaring good time on your first date with barely a quiet moment, she will be worried that the conversation will run dry. If she starts chatting about something inane during an awkward silence, it is because she is wound up, not because she thinks that it was a genuinely good idea to regale you with a story that goes nowhere.
About Natasha Abrahams Natasha Abrahams is a writer and journalism student from Melbourne, Australia. When she is not busy with being a principal writer on Weekendnotes or skipping lectures, she can be found emptying her wallet at the nearest shopping centre. You can read more from Natasha at: http://mensstyleandfashion.com/