Signs You’re Staying in a Relationship Out Of Convenience
Good relationships should be convenient in a sense, in that they aren’t disruptive to your everyday life. But there is a difference between finding a drama free situation and not having any real spark whatsoever. Here are some signs that you’re and nothing else.
If you’ve ever considered breaking up with this person but then got fatigued by the thought of how complicated that would be, you might be staying for the wrong reasons. No breakups are seamless but if the relationship isn’t making you happier then eventually the time comes where you need to reevaluate your priorities. This is exactly why you don’t move in together and get a dog after one month of dating. It makes it harder to separate out your real feelings when everything else is all tangled up.
What happens to your mutual friendships can’t be the main concern either. Breakups always have the potential to be disruptive to other aspects of our lives but without dealing with those shakeups we could never be pushed into the next chapter of our lives.
In all honesty the current state of your relationship is not that great but things were good once so you’re assuming it’s just the natural oscillation of things. Not so much. Of course relationships can turn around, but it usually takes a bit of effort on both parts and not just sitting back to see what happens. If things aren’t good you’re settling for less than you deserve.
Relationships are support systems, so if your main squeeze is making you feel bad…what’s the point. You should want to make each other happy at the end of the day.
There are a lot of reasons why sex in a monogamous relationship is cool, you’re not stressed about STD’s, cling ons, or finding the next girl to do. Plus, your girlfriend probably knows her way around pretty well so you at least know what to expect out of the act. But if the sex is there and nothing else is, it isn’t worth having the title. Let’s be honest if you break up it won’t take you that long to find someone else to sleep with, and even if it did you would survive.
You’re a good guy for not wanting to smash anyone’s heart, but not for not respecting her. If the only reason that you haven’t ended things yet is because you’re trying to protect her you’re just dragging out the inevitable and potentially asking for a bigger issue. When you casually mention that it’s been over for you for months she’s not going to be happy about it. Give the girl some credit here, if you haven’t asked about her feelings lately maybe she’s not even feeling it either. It is possible for relationships to mutually sizzle out.
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About Kate Ferguson Kate Fergus is a Los Angeles local and freelance writer for a variety of blogs and online magazines. When she's not writing, the UC Davis graduate is focused on pursuits of the entertainment industry, spin class, and hot sauce.