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How to have a drama free relationship

couple arguing

Your relationship should not be a boxing match.

Don’t get into a relationship where you will be constantly fighting

If you are finding that your previous relationships have been tumultuous, there are two possible explanations: either you have a habit of picking women who like starting fights, or you are the dramatic one. A combination of these factors is common; highly strung individuals seem to be attracted to each other. These strategies will help you avoid getting into turbulent relationships and to reduce the fights you do have.

Avoid the drama queens

The easiest way to reduce the amount of headaches in your love life? Avoid dating women who are the human embodiment of headaches. This can be hard to spot when you are getting to know each other and are both on your best behavior, but there are a few red flags to watch out for:

  • Having lots of former friends that she has had fights with
  • A large amount of past relationships for her age
  • Speaking ill of all of her ex boyfriends
  • Proclaiming that she ‘hates drama’. She hates it because it seems to follow her around. It always seems to be the people who express a distaste for drama that are causing it.

Of course, sometimes you think you have snagged a laidback girl, only to find that your relationship is full of fights. To some degree this is normal, though frequent blowouts indicate a lack of compatibility. Also, if you suspect you are actually the instigator of drama the majority of the time, you may still have an unstable relationship even with the most relaxed of girls.

Set boundaries

Let’s say it’s too late for the above advice, and you have found yourself in a relationship with a bona fine drama queen. Ending the relationship is one strategy, but if you have this problem in every relationship, you are certainly at least part of the problem. It is time to learn how to minimise conflict, and setting boundaries is a simple way to avoid most arguments. Be clear about your expectations of her, and about what you are willing to put in to the relationship. The boundaries you need to set are specific to your situation, but a common one involves contact with exes. Talk about what is acceptable and not acceptable in your relationship, and you will avoid many an argument.

Own your mistakes

Always being right is not conducive to a cruisy relationship. I am not saying you should concede defeat when she is very clearly in the wrong, but do be mindful of admitting fault when necessary. If you did something you know you should not have, admit it. Too often, arguments are sustained because both people insist that they are right, and will not budge. Rather than defending yourself at all costs, it is better to approach potential fights as a conversation about what went wrong and what will be different next time. Learning how to resolve conflicts like an adult is your easy ticket to a drama-free relationship.

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About Natasha Abrahams Natasha Abrahams is a writer and journalism student from Melbourne, Australia. When she is not busy with being a principal writer on Weekendnotes or skipping lectures, she can be found emptying her wallet at the nearest shopping centre. You can read more from Natasha at: http://mensstyleandfashion.com/

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