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What to Know About Dating a Girl With a Kid

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When we date in our younger years it never really occurs to us what would happen if we met someone who already had a kid, but by the time you’re in your mid 20’s the situation becomes more likely. Dating a girl who already has a kid with someone else can be awesome, but it’s also a little more complicated and there are some additional things to keep in mind. Here are some things to think about when you’re going to date a girl who has a kid.

Don’t Waste Her Time

When you’re dating a woman who has a kid it’s important to keep in mind staying honest and fair throughout the process. Mom’s are busy so if she’s considering spending time with you than she probably thinks pretty highly of you. Of course every dating situation is going to take some time to get to know each other so there is always a phase of not knowing what’s going to happen, but as soon as you make up your mind about her one way or the other you should speak up. No use stringing someone along if it’s not going to happen.

Be Respectful of Her Ex

Normally when we break up with people we don’t have to introduce them to our new relationships, but when there’s a kid involved she is going to be talking to her ex forever more. They might even talk all the time since they’re trying to raise a kid together. If you like the girl it’s in your best interest to stay out of situation in the sense that you can’t be jealous of their communication habits, and you shouldn’t be disrespectful of the guy no matter what happened in their relationship. He will always be the father to her child whether you like him or not.

The Kid Is Not Guaranteed to Like You

At the point that end up meeting her kid, there can be some challenges regarding how he or she feels about you. In the best case they’re pretty reasonable and open…but these are children that we are talking about so that is not even remotely guaranteed. Many children feel scared when their parents bring new people around because it disrupts the status quo and they feel out of control. This can put you in an awkward place because sometimes it can feel like you’re coming up against a wall and there’s no predetermined “right” way to handle it.

But it Can Also Be Pretty Great

Besides the potential challenges involved however, dating someone with a kid also has a lot of benefits. There can be a lot less dating drama since single mom’s are usually pretty straightforward with their needs since they always have to put the kid first. And when you do get along with the kid it’s an awesome opportunity to grow through having that sort of relationship. It’s like getting a crash course lesson before you decide to have children of your own.

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About Kate Ferguson Kate Fergus is a Los Angeles local and freelance writer for a variety of blogs and online magazines. When she's not writing, the UC Davis graduate is focused on pursuits of the entertainment industry, spin class, and hot sauce.

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