3 Ways to be Less Boring in the Bedroom
Do you need a little help in the bedroom? Don’t feel bad if you do; you are not alone.
It isn’t that you are doing it wrong, you may just be missing the “boom.” Look, every man wants to be the “one” that rocks a woman’s world. Unless you are an asshole, a great performance in the bedroom, creates a woman hungry for more.
Women love sex just as much as men, sometimes more. They talk about it, compare sex partners and talk about us like we are meat with their girlfriends, just like men do. Don’t think they aren’t. Fortunately, since they talk about what they like, want and need, you can gain some info about doing it right in the bedroom.
The main thing to remember when reading advice and learning about female desires, is to read each woman individually. Just because women generally enjoy something, doesn’t mean they don’t have specific wants, needs, or even kinks. When you are sexual with a woman, she needs to your focus. You need to be in her head, listening to her words and syncing your experience to hers.
Be tuned in and aware of her responses. When you do something that generates a positive response, continue doing so. If you are seeing less responsiveness to something, change your tactics. Seems simple, right? Unfortunately, most men try something with a woman, and keep trying harder if they don’t get positive response.
In case you aren’t aware, men are notorious for leaving women unsatisfied in the bedroom. The primary reason for this is lack of time investment. We fail women because we take a fast and furious approach in the bedroom. Most of the time, men are finishing, just as she is getting started.
Men don’t need a lot of build-up to get off. We get turned on, dick gets hard, dick gets stimulated and we get off. All of this can happen in minutes. From the standpoint of instant gratification, this is great. From a woman’s perspective, not so much.
Males masturbate from a young age. For a multitude of reasons, it is usually over and done quickly. Sadly, we as males transition this process into the bedroom later. Women masturbate as well, and often, just as quickly. However, the process of orgasming for women is completely different when having sex. They need stimulation (mental and physical), arousal and to feel desired.
Slowing down when it comes to sex gives a woman the things she needs. Taking your time tells her that you are in to her. She feels special, mainly because she is expecting a quick-shot guy only concerned with his own orgasm.
Take the time to kiss, nuzzle, touch, stroke, talk sexy or dirty and explore her body. Every woman you have sex with should be treated as a piece of art that must be memorized. She can tell when you are invested in her body and pleasure.
If you are fully involved in bringing a woman pleasure, she will reciprocate. Whether she is exploring your body, kissing you, rubbing you or stroking/sucking your cock, she needs to know she is doing well.
Men are often too silent in the bedroom. This leaves women wondering if they are doing things right, or should just give up and let you screw her. Remember when I said pay attention to her responses? Guess what, you must respond as well.
Think about your job. When you do something well, you enjoy recognition. It makes you work harder the next time. You feel confident in your job, and appreciated by your boss and co-workers. Women in bed are no different. When she gets a positive response to her techniques in bed, she will work harder to get more. She is more eager to please, because it is working.
So, this means you need to let her know. Don’t be afraid to tell her how good it feels. Hell, even a pleasurable grunt and an arched back is feedback. Being vocal during sex is highly important to creating a more eager and willing partner. Reminder, women are aroused more by audio than video.
Ask yourself what you know about sex. Do you know what a g-spot is? Do you know where it is? Do you know the right stroke for different positions? How many positions do you know in the first place? What does multi-orgasmic mean?
If you don’t know the answers to some, or all, of these questions, you need to educate yourself more. If you wanted a job as a welder, you can’t be handed a welding torch and told get to it. You would be screwed. Just like most things in this world, education goes a long way.
You need to understand that women need variety. They need to feel something more than routine. Routine is going to lead to less and less arousal during sex. It isn’t just about different positions, it is about different techniques in different positions.
For example, during doggy-style sex, a shorter, shallow thrust is better than deep. During Cuban Plunge (man on top, her knees up and legs on your shoulders), the stroke will be deep, but you need to know too deep vs. pleasurable deep. During spooning sex, your stimulation will be higher, so you’ll need to pace too prevent getting off to quick. Are you stimulating her clit while fucking? Are you adjusting your angle in missionary to give an upward stroke that stimulates the g-spot?
Those are just a few things that you might want to know. Trust me, there are far too many to list in this article. Fortunately, there are sources for this. There are many books that can give insight into broadening your sexual horizons and skill sets. The key is to learn, and practice good bedroom techniques.
Overall, you want to have great sex, and so do women. No matter what anyone tells you, men are the reason for a good or bad sexual encounter. Ask any woman, and you will rarely, if EVER, hear her say “I was horrible in bed.” What you will hear is: “He was selfish”, “He didn’t get me off”, “He was kind of boring”. Notice, it is always us.
Fix this by educating yourself, learn to read women and improvise during sex. Keep it fun, original and vocal. Don’t focus on your own “getting off”, your smart bedroom approach will have her making sure you are.
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About robertbrasher A creative writer for many years, with experiences in many areas. People fascinate me, and stoke my desire to educate the masses on the madness we can and do create in this world. Through writing, we pass knowledge; through understanding, we pass tradition.