An Inexplicable Attraction
Some women are attractive to every red-blooded man. Some split the opinion of the brotherhood. Still others have no obvious attractive qualities about them. When you find yourself drawn to a woman who is in the latter category, it can be a problem.
A large part of dating is social. To be seen with a girl who is considered hot and sexy boosts your standing amongst other men and women, some of whom may be future dates. Knowing that your current crush is in no way a conventional beauty may give you second thoughts about asking her out.
But before you go any further you should think about why you are attracted to her in the first place.
No one really understands sexual chemistry. All we do know is that it exists. Perhaps your crush is tall in stature and lithe in figure and moves with a grace and an elegance that more than makes up for a homely face. You should also not underestimate the lure of someone who thinks as you do and shares your sense of humor. If you both have a deep interest in books and politics, the conversation alone may act as a potent aphrodisiac.
Indeed, you may know plenty of girls with similar traits, but you have never thought about dating any of them. But there is something about this girl that drives you absolutely wild with desire.
Here are a few tips on how to handle the situation:
The inexplicable attraction you feel may come down to the mere desire to bone a girl who you think is easy to get into the sack. It could also be the opposite. Perhaps you think she should feel honored to have you in her bed, but she has proven unusually elusive and impervious to your charm. In other words, you want what you can’t have, and that is your only reason for pursuing her.
Before you make any moves know what your end game is. If you just want sex, a conventional courtship may not be needed.
If you do think there can be more than a sexual relationship between you, then you should ask her out. But be discrete in those first few dates. If you are used to dating extremely beautiful women, it will take some time for you to get used to having someone on your arm who is not.
You need not announce to the world that you are dating a woman whose looks are less than perfect. Go to places that you know are not frequented by your friends for the first few dates. If at some point you feel comfortable being with her, then you can make your relationship known.
You might actually have fun. One of the reasons you are unable to explain your attraction to your current crush may owe to the fact that her manner and personality have awakened something in you that none of the pretty girls you dated before were able to. You should make the most of this. Screw the world, go with your gut, and have a great time with a woman who makes you happy. And remember, there is always the possibility of playing the long game: https://www.tsbmag.com/2015/08/12/3-rules-to-playing-the-long-game/
Do girls leave you confused as to whether or not they like you?
Let's face it. Girl's don't make it easy for you. She will often send mixed signals leaving you unable to tell if she is being friendly or flirty. If you read her signals wrong you risk rejection and embarrassment. Or worse, you blow it with a girl who wanted to kiss you.
Here is a simple and innocent move that will instantly tell you if you're in the friend zone, or if she's waiting for you to kiss her.
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About Christopher Reid Chris was born in Washington, D.C. and lives in Britain. He works as a blogger, essayist, and novelist. His first book, Tea with Maureen, has just been published.