Sticking Point #15 Getting To Average
There were a few questions about this sticking point in the comments, so I figured I’d start by taking a look at getting to average.
This is actually one of the first sticking points you need to deal with in order to start actually getting dates, lays etc… But I forgot it until the end of my list and was too lazy to go move it to the front.
Contrary to the opinions of extremely out of touch internet PUA fanboys, the average guy does in fact get laid. He is not an average frustrated chump, nor are you better than him because you study pick up. In fact you’re probably studying pick up because you’re not good enough to be average with women.
Most (Read :all) guys who find this stuff start off well below average. I know I did in may areas: Looks, Neediness, Sexual Anxiety, etc…
So how do you get to normal?
By doing a few BASIC but often difficult, and time consuming things:
1. Start working out. If you’re not in shape you have no right to complain about not getting girls. Not trying to hear it.
2. Get a makeover. Guys for whatever reason tend to keep the haircut they had in college or when they first got out into the work force. They also tend to keep their same style. This is one of the major reasons you’re not getting girls. Change it. And shut up about money, you can get a good haircut for $24 at most Floyd’s barbershops or equivalent and you can shop discount retailers like Ross and Marshals and even thrift stores for cheap new looks.
3. Get a life. Meaning you need to start getting out of the house for interacting socially 3-4 times a week EVERY week. It doesn’t have to be pick up but you need to start going out and talking to people in networking groups, volunteer work, co-ed sports teams, comedy or music classes etc… Being social is something you have to do a lot to get good at, and it’s something that takes TIME. It’s impossible to get good results socially whether it’s networking, making friends, or getting laid without putting in a lot of time on a regular (read: weekly) basis.
4. Learn BASIC social skills. You don’t need to be the most interesting guy in the world but you do need to be able to have a normal conversation without saying anything too weird, creepy, boring or self centered. If you’ve seen my stuff on social comfort or filling in the gaps with normal conversation you know what I’m talking about.
5. Start asking girls out. In a well publicized study in 1978 that was repeated in 1982 at Florida State University scientists Russell D Clark III and Elaine Hatfield had an average man and an average woman approach members of the opposite sex and ask them to in order; go on a date with them, come back to their apartment with them and to have sex with them.
50% of women agreed to go on a date with the average man. Even if you adjust for flaking with the 90% rate that most men get it still translates to 10% of girls showing up which is a similar rate to those reported by PUAs.
So once you’re average you need to start asking girls out and seeing what the results are then if you’re still having problems we can move on to the rest of the technical and tactical sticking points that men encounter when approaching women.
Do girls leave you confused as to whether or not they like you?
Let's face it. Girl's don't make it easy for you. She will often send mixed signals leaving you unable to tell if she is being friendly or flirty. If you read her signals wrong you risk rejection and embarrassment. Or worse, you blow it with a girl who wanted to kiss you.
Here is a simple and innocent move that will instantly tell you if you're in the friend zone, or if she's waiting for you to kiss her.
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About john sinn Sinn is widely regarded as the second best PUA in the world. Sinn is known for his hard nosed style and take no excuses approach to teaching. He is a nondenominational teacher, which means that he subscribes to no particular method and instead blends the best of every school of seduction to create the best possible results for himself and his students. Sinn is currently running his own pick up company The Sinns Of Attraction, which offers live, phone and email training.