Being the Fearless Bad Boy (day 25)
We are at day 25 of our 31 Days to Better Game series. We’ve been trying to mix in both theory and practical advice into this series. The goal is for you to gain knowledge of what works, but to also be able to go out and immediately put what you’re learning into practice.
Today’s lesson is on the subject of being the bad boy. We recently did a podcast titled “How to be the Bad Boy Women Want.” This lesson will draw on some of the stuff we talked about there, as well as touch on some things we didn’t have a chance to discuss last Friday.
Being the Bad Boy by Bobby Rio
You probably noticed as far back as grade school, that girls are attracted to guys who possess a bit of that bad boy persona. In fact, if you’re like most us, you’ve probably often asked yourself “why all girls like the assholes?” or “How comes the jerks get all the girls?”
This is not so say that being a bad boy makes you an asshole or a jerk. The reason most of us viewed these guys as assholes or jerks is simply because we were jealous and envious that these guys were always dating the girls that we wanted, while we were getting stuck in the friend’s zone. So instead of trying to learn from these “jerks” whom we weren’t alpha enough to hang with, we found it easier to blame society for our lack of success with women, and create an acceptable excuse for ourselves, “women only like the assholes.”
Well boys, it’s time to MAN up!
There is plenty that can be learned from these bad boys. Even if some of their reckless behavior will never suit your personality, you can try adopting some of their character traits to increase your attractiveness.
If you’ve found yourself too often getting stuck in the friend zone, it is simply because that is the vibe that you’ve been sending off.
You want to shed your “nice guy” image?
It is impossible to try to imitate specific bad boy behavior. It will come across forced and insincere. Instead, put yourself in their mindset. Live life through their eyes.
The Bad Boy trait you should emulate
1. You’re fearless. Most people are insecure. Most people suffer some form of anxiety disorder. Most people are held back by various forms of fear.
If you want to stand out in a crowd; Live a fearless existence. Feel the fear; then do it anyway. Most of our fears are completed unwarranted. Most fear stems from our need for approval. We are held back by our fear of losing our job, our fear of being laughed at, our fear of going broke, our fear of rejection, our fear of ruining our reputation, our fear of making a mistake.
What would your personality be like if you weren’t governed by all of these fears? If you take a look at the short list of our major fears… you’ll find that not one of them is life threatening. In fact, most of our major fears are solely based on what thoughts someone else will have about us.
How ridiculous does that sound when you really think about it? 90% of the decisions that you make are influenced by your need for approval.
Most of us are working a job we hate, lonely or in a shitty relationship, have given up our dreams… because we are afraid of making the wrong decision, and we’re not even afraid of the consequences of the wrong decision… We are afraid of what people will say about us… what people will think about us.
How refreshing is it when we meet someone who isn’t controlled by these fears?
Women are attracted to bad boys, because bad boys provide an adrenaline rush that the average guy does not. In the average guy, a woman sees a reflection of most of her fears and insecurities. This is why the average guy becomes her friend. Because they can sit and talk and wallow in their fears and insecurities together. The bad boy makes her forget all about her fears and insecurities. He takes her into his fearless existence.
And she gets addicted to it.
My challenge to you
Live the next two days of your life completely fearless. Just for the next two days, say what you feel like saying, approach who you feel like approaching, tell someone who has pissed you off to “fuck off,” do exactly what you want to do.
Do you want to call out of work and go the beach? Do it! Do you want to tell the counter girl at the bank that she’s sexy as hell? Do it! Do you want to finally change the style of your haircut? Jump out a plane? Get a tattoo? Have sex with a stranger? Do whatever the fuck you want! Whenever the fuck you want!
Do this for just 2 days and experience the thrill of being fearless. After the two days you can go back to worrying about what people think, or how you appear, or whatever other insignificant, trivial reason is holding you back.
More information on being the bad boy
In our most recent podcast we went over an entire list of ways you can take on more of the bad boy attitude. We even went into specific examples, showing how a bad boy would react as opposed to the typical “nice guy.”
If you feel that you need to incorporate more bad boy traits into your persona I highly recommend listening to our How to Be the Bad Boy Women Want podcast.
About Bobby Rio I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences. For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.