Building Your Social Resume
In The Four Hour Work Week Tim Ferriss points out that in today’s world the definition of an expert is largely created through the affiliations he or she belongs to, the testimonials they have, and the appearances they’ve made.
This means that in order to coin yourself an expert in say, the real estate world, you would need to belong to several trade organizations, have a bunch of happy customers , and have performed some speaking engagements or received some media coverage relating to the subject.
With this definition… in all likelihood, anyone can become an “expert” on any subject in a short period of time.
I believe that you should view your social life in the same way.
If you use the above formula for “becoming an expert” and apply it to “becoming a social rock star” you will quickly see your social status sky rocket!
We human being don’t have the time or energy to really dig deeply to find out the truth about someone… so we look for the clues that will make these judgments easy for us.
We want to be able to quickly classify a person into a certain group, so that we know how to approach and deal with them.
It is known that girls use this tactic all of the time in bars and clubs to make their judgments on guys. This is why it is taught in the community that you need to create social proof through being the most social guy in the place and then using routines and stories in your conversations that further exemplify your high social status.
While I completely agree with this theory… I believe that you should take it a step further and position yourself as a Rockstar.
How do you do this?
You do this the same way a so-called expert builds his resume. You affiliate with other rockstars, you get testimonials, and you make appearances at the right venues.
A couple weeks ago Mike Stoute, Pete the Freshman, and I added to our social resume when we attended the party at Playboy Mansion.
Sure I had a vague curiosity to party at the Mansion… but I knew it wouldn’t be nearly as fun as some of my rendezvous in Brazil, or even this past Mansformation Weekend.
Then why did I treck across the country to go there? Simple. I was further solidifying my position as a Rockstar.
The value in the trip to the Mansion wasn’t the girls we were going to hit on there. The value came from the pictures we took, and the stories we are now able to continually tell about the experience.
Immediately after attending the event, Mike, Pete, and I plastered our Facebook pages with the pictures, twittered the news, and wrote detailed accounts of the experience that we emailed all of our friends.
The results were immediate.
Within hours of changing our Facebook status to “Partying at the Playboy Mansion” we each had girls we hadn’t spoken to in years leaving us comments and emails with questions like “How did you guys get in the party?” “I heard that was a private party, who do you know?” and so on.
Last week when we attended a reunion at our former college, the news of our adventure in the Mansion had already spread like wildfire… and we’re continually pressed and praised about it.
Do you think that created some instant social proof? We never even had to bring it up in a conversation, as someone would inevitably ask us about it.
It is a simple theory really. If you want to be viewed as a Social Rockstar… become one!
The number one tool that you have in creating your social resume is your Facebook and Myspace accounts. If you don’t have an account…GET ONE!
You have to view these accounts as your publicity machine. These two accounts (I prefer Facebook) will be constantly marketing your unique selling points. (U.S.P.s are something I will discuss further in a future article)
You have to view your Facebook friends as a master marketer views his list. To a marketer, a list is what creates sales… a list is what spreads word of mouth, and a list is what connects a marketer to his customers. Facebook is your list.
I could write an entire post about the specifics of creating your Facebook or Myspace profile, but you’re better off learning from an expert. This is an area you do not want to slack off in.
Once you have a platform for showcasing your “proof” you need to start acquiring it. Remember, proof comes from your associations, your testimonials, and your appearances.
You probably noticed that I used the word perceived in the above definitions. This is because it is more important to create the image of… then to be consistently living it.
For example, my pictures from the Mansion create the image of a guy who is invited to high profile-hard to get into parties. If you couple these pictures with another group of pictures from one other exclusive event… you’ll be perceived as the kind of guy who regularly attends these sort of events.
The testimonials are easy to get… if you’re living the life, people will naturally be talking about you and leaving comments on your page. If you’re new to it Race and Kelly give a couple fantastic tips for getting hot girls to leave comments on your page.
In future posts I will continue this theme of building your social resume… for right now just become aware of how easy it is to guide the perception of you through associations, testimonials, and appearances.
About Bobby Rio I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences. For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.