Beware The Pill
Once you?re in a monogamous relationship, there?s a good chance your girlfriend will decide to go on the pill. On the surface it seems like a Godsend.
Assuming you guys both get tested before having sex without condoms, it makes life much easier. You no longer have to keep restocking on rubbers and you don?t need to call timeouts to lube up. Best part about it is that spontaneous acts of sex are in-play.
You guys are both in the dining table, eating a bowl of ice cream. Bam. Right on the dining table. Out at a park late at night. Find some softer than expected grass that hasn?t been touched by the sprinklers. Bam. Right out in front of the stars. Up late at night finishing off a problem set. Bam. Right on the desk.
OK, I need to halt the fantasizing. Anyways, while the benefits of bringing in birth control to your relationship are immense, there is one thing you should be cautious about. That one thing? Too much sex.
OK take a big deep breath here. Before you start building a fire to roast me, hear me out.
In both times that I?ve been in relationships involving the pill, after a week or so, I was going at it three times a day. We would usually meet up for dinner, but before we could make it to the kitchen, we would be going at it. Then after cuddling for 15 minutes, we would start getting dressed.
Not willing to see a pair of succulent breasts go into hibernation just yet, I would resist. After another 15 minutes we would find ourselves cuddling again. Once dinner was done, well why not go at it again? I mean, come on! What better way is there to start burning calories from a large meal?
There are a few problems that arise out of this situation of seemingly awesomeness.
First, the process of sex became formulaic. Even though it was more fluid in terms of just being able to do it whenever we wanted, we were having sex on a schedule. One of the huge pluses of birth control was supposed to be the spontaneity of intercourse. Instead you could set a watch to when were going to be making the bed springs creak.
An even larger issue was that we were spending so much time on sex, there wouldn?t be time for other things. Often plans that we previously made to go out and do something would be canceled simply because we were too lazy to hope out of bed and get dressed.
The first time I was in a relationship with birth control, the essence of the relationship quickly developed into sex. It was kind of pathetic to be honest. We would rarely go out for dinner or to the movies. We were content to bone all day, and it may not seem like it, but that gets old awfully fast.
Don?t get me wrong, I still think the positives of birth control outweigh the potential downside. Just watch out to make sure you don?t fall into the same traps I have.
Sex is supposed to provide a release from the ordinary day. It can?t provide that release, though, when the act of sex becomes what your day is about.
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About Mustafa Shaikh Mustafa Shaikh is an aspiring writer living in Berkeley, CA. Not willing to give up his college days just yet, he lives only a few blocks away from his beloved campus. He hopes to write a best-seller within the next couple of years and live off the royalties of it for as long as possible.