Is She Interested Or Just Being Polite?
You have worked up the courage to go and talk to her, and all seems to be going well. But don’t jump the gun and presume she is into you just because she is partaking in conversation- she may only be talking to you because she does not want to be rude.
You may think it is a good sign that she is talking to you, but you might not have given her much choice. If you have started talking to her at the bar as she waits to order her drink, she may only be talking to you because she does not want to have to awkwardly stand near you after she’s told you to leave her alone. You are best advised to presume she is not interested unless she demonstrates otherwise.
The easiest way to tell if she is genuinely interested or just talking to you because she does not want to be rude is to see if she is flirting. Laughter, touching your arms, drawing herself closer to you, and talking only to you when you are part of a group are among the more obvious signals to look for. Even shy girls know how to flirt, but in less overt ways. Blushing and maintaining plenty of eye contact are more subtle signals to watch out for.
You might think that because she is smiling at you, she is interested. However, for most women a smile is not a sign of interest if it is not coupled with other flirty behaviours. It is more likely that she is smiling because she has gone into customer-service mode: she wants to keep a distance between you without being overtly unpleasant. She could also be smiling because she feels uncomfortable. A shared smile can be a good thing, but it all depends on the type of smile and its context.
An assertive woman who is not interested in you is unlikely to be polite to you for long while you are trying to flirt with her. She does not want to waste her time, and she does not want you to get the wrong idea. So, if you notice that she is generally an assertive person but is willing to spend time conversing with you, she is not just talking to you because it is the nice thing to do. She wants something out of you, and it’s possible that what she wants to take things further.
A girl who is only talking to you to be nice is hoping for the conversation to die. She will answer your questions, but will not ask you many questions back. She will not start new topics, and will rarely step in to fill an awkward silence. When she is interested, however, she will be really interested in the conversation and will happily volunteer information about herself and return your questions. Even shy or socially awkward types will try to keep the conversation going, even though their best attempts may involve blurting out silly things as they come to mind.
Here is full breakdown on how to tell if a woman is interested in you.
About Natasha Abrahams Natasha Abrahams is a writer and journalism student from Melbourne, Australia. When she is not busy with being a principal writer on Weekendnotes or skipping lectures, she can be found emptying her wallet at the nearest shopping centre. You can read more from Natasha at: http://mensstyleandfashion.com/