Sending the First Text to a Girl
No short and boring messages
If you open up a text conversation with a “Hey” or “Hi, how are you going?” the conversation is not going to go very far. While simple openers do work in real life, in texting you have to be more engaging. She may not bother replying to a boring message, and then you will just look desperate by messaging her again.
Address her by name
Women like it when you use their names. If you don’t remember her name, or you are not sure of the spelling, give her a playful nickname. Calling her “crazy girl” will work if she is the life of the party, while something like “Miss Mysterious” would be better if she is more the shy and quiet type.
Tell her who it is
You have asked her for her number, but have not given her yours. You then spend hours composing the perfect text, only to receive the reply “Who is this?” because you were too absent-minded to include your name. Keep it simple and tell her who you are near the start of the text. So far, your text should like something like “Hey Simone, this is Matthew”. Nothing flirty so far (unless you have used a nickname for her), but that is the next step.
If you are now in damage control mode after forgetting to include your name in the first text, you can save face and introduce some flirting by making her guess who you are in subsequent texts.
Make a reference to when you met
Make reference to an in-joke or something that happened. Try to make it funny. If you honestly have nothing to go on, use a generic phrase such as “it was lovely to meet you”. Note that you should not substitute in the word “great” for “lovely” in this instance, as it is much less romantic. You should also avoid going overboard. If you say it was “wonderful” or “incredible” to meet you, you will come off as too intense.
Set up a date
Do not be afraid to set up a date too soon. The sooner you do this in your text conversation, the better. I would suggest you even do it in the first text. Give her some semblance of concrete plans. Rather than ask if she wants to go out sometime, tell her that there is a new restaurant opening (for example) and you’d like to try it tomorrow, and ask if she is keen.
Putting it together
All put together, your perfect first text will look something like that:
“Hey Simone, this is Matthew. It was lovely meeting you last night. There’s a street festival on in the city tomorrow night, would you be keen to accompany me?”
This gets straight to the point. Note that if she never replies, it is because she is not interested. Do not take this as your cue to send yet more texts. There is nothing you can say from this point that will not make you look desperate.
Here is another article on the topic: https://www.tsbmag.com/2018/03/02/funny-flirty-texts-to-send-a-girl/
About Natasha Abrahams Natasha Abrahams is a writer and journalism student from Melbourne, Australia. When she is not busy with being a principal writer on Weekendnotes or skipping lectures, she can be found emptying her wallet at the nearest shopping centre. You can read more from Natasha at: http://mensstyleandfashion.com/