Six Pillars of Self Esteem (Part 3 of 3)
Two weeks ago I began a three part series on the Six Pillars of Self Esteem.?These six pillars are based on a book by Nathaniel Brandon. Self esteem is a central ingredient in any type of success.?And I think there is a giant myth about this idea of self confidence and self esteem.
Well, in this series on the Six Pillars of Self Esteem I aim to give you the tools to increase your self esteem resulting in more self confidence. Remember, the six pillars of self esteem are:
1. The practice of Living Consciously
2. The practice of Self Acceptance
3. The practice of Self responsibility
4. The practice of Self Assertiveness
5. The practice of Living Purposefully
6. The practice of Personal Integrity
In the first article I talked about?Living Consciously and Self Acceptance. In the second article I talked about the idea of Self Responsibility and Self Assertiveness.?In this article I am going to talk about the idea of Living Purposely and Personal Integrity.
The Fifth Pillar:? The Practice of Living Purposely
I cannot even begin to tell you what kind of shift took place in my life when I began living on purpose.?For years after college, I had basically wandered from one job I hated to the next.?I had no clear goals, and very little purpose in life.
Then about five years ago I began this website, TSB Magazine.?Suddenly everything in my life seemed to fall into place. I was doing something I loved.?Many people were writing me to tell me I was having an impact on their lives.?And I began surrounding myself with people of similar ambitions.
I now had clear, concise goals to strive for. I knew each day how much closer I was getting towards the fulfillment of my goals.?This vastly increased my desire to get out of bed every morning and start the day. To live purposely is to use our powers for the attainment of goals we have selected for ourselves. Here are some tips for living purposely:
Formulate meaningful goals.
Identify your action steps.
Monitor your behavior.
Pay attention to outcome.
This one of the biggest benefits guys have been saying about the Social Training Lab.?It is that for the first time, they have clear goals, and a mentor to help them achieve them, and get feedback along the way.
The Sixth Pillar:? The Practice of Personal Integrity
A couple years back, during the Roger Clemens steroid scandal, I wrote an article titled Integrity Makes a Man. At the time, I had no clue how much I would come to believe this idea over the next couple years. The fact is, when we behave in ways that conflict with our judgment of what is appropriate we lose face in our own eyes.?You can pretend for only so long, before you eventually lose trust in yourself. Examples of Integrity:
Tell people when they do things that bother you.
Don?t laugh at jokes you don’t find funny, or find offensive.
Tell me the truth.
Keep all of your promises (especially the ones you make to yourself).
Admit when others have helped you.
These seem so simple, yet so many of us sacrifice our personal integrity for instant gratification.?If you want a rock solid program on developing your inner game in regards to women, I highly suggest checking out the program Unbreakable.
In addition to checking out the rest of this series on self esteem, I would also recommend this article I wrote on 5 activities that grow your self esteem.
Do girls leave you confused as to whether or not they like you?
Let's face it. Girl's don't make it easy for you. She will often send mixed signals leaving you unable to tell if she is being friendly or flirty. If you read her signals wrong you risk rejection and embarrassment. Or worse, you blow it with a girl who wanted to kiss you.
Here is a simple and innocent move that will instantly tell you if you're in the friend zone, or if she's waiting for you to kiss her.
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About Bobby Rio I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences. For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.