How To Talk To Women in Public Places

You don?t have to go clubbing to pick up. You can find women in all sorts of places- at the bus stop, in class, at the shops, waiting for the elevator? the possibilities are endless. However, your approach needs to be completely different to how you might talk to a woman in a nightclub.

Does she want to be talked to?

Before you even think of saying anything, look for cues to see if she is approachable. A woman with earphones in does not want to be talked to. She is in her own little world and will probably not appreciate a stranger trying to intrude. If she?s doing anything to make her look busy, such as reading or on playing on her phone, she probably does not want to be approached.

You?re in luck if she?s not doing much and seems to be bored. She will most likely be willing to talk to you, unless you manage to creep her out early on in the interaction.

Exchanging glances

You think she?s open to be talked to- there are no obvious cues that she wants to be left alone- but you don?t want to come off as too forward and set yourself up for a rejection. Try to exchange a few glances with her before you open your mouth. Don?t stare at her- make them fleeting glances. This provides you with a way of gauging if she might be interested or not. If she?s avoiding looking at you, she does not want you to talk to her. After you?ve exchanged a few meaningful looks, it?s time to say something before it gets awkward.

How to start talking to her

The most important thing to keep in mind when talking to random women in public places is: don?t be a weirdo. Above all, just act normal. Don?t pull out any fancy tricks or sleazy pick-up lines. Try to find something to talk about in your surroundings. For example, if you take the same train every week and you always see each other, you could comment on that. If you?re struggling to find a conversation starter, you could go with ?You look interesting. What?s your name??. Don?t make it about her looks though- if you tell her she looks cute, she will immediately consider you to be a creep.

If the conversation stalls, it?s probably because she?s not interested. A few awkward pauses are okay, but if you need to carry the entire conversation, she?s just being polite in talking to you.

Don?t be creepy

If you?ve tried to strike up a conversation and she?s clearly not interested, don?t keep trying. Let her have her space. Talking to her more will make her feel uncomfortable, and it won?t get you anywhere. If anything, she will be even more unimpressed with you as you keep trying. Just because she happens to be in the same public place that you are, does not mean that she owes it to you to have a polite conversation. Consider it your good luck if you manage to pick up- but don?t get disheartened that many women you approach probably aren?t interested.

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About Natasha Abrahams Natasha Abrahams is a writer and journalism student from Melbourne, Australia. When she is not busy with being a principal writer on Weekendnotes or skipping lectures, she can be found emptying her wallet at the nearest shopping centre. You can read more from Natasha at: