What To Do When You Didn’t Get Her Number
Sometimes, you just didn’t get her number. Maybe the moment never arose, maybe your friends were always hanging around and it felt super awkward, maybe one of you just had to leave early.
Now, I stress moving fast and always having the confidence to escalate, but the fact is, we’re not robots. Nobodies perfect and even pro ball players strike out sometimes.
But how do you recover from this? You met a girl. You like her and now you have no way of contacting her.
And remember, time is of the essence because any girl worth your time, surely has other guys seeking hers.
Right off the bat, I have to say that if you asked for her number and she said, “no”, then I wouldn’t pursue her any further. You’ll just have to wait until/ hope that you see her again. A woman flat not wanting you to have her number is a very strong sign that she doesn’t want you contacting her. Maybe you can redeem yourself next time.
I should also point out that the more sexual tension you’ve created with a girl, the better. This rule always rings true, but it’s especially true for this trick, so don’t just think you can slack off on in-person flirting and fall back on following up later.
So, how do you track down somebody whose phone number you don’t have?
Back in the day it would have been the phonebook, but now it’s Facebook.
If you met a girl at a party or social gathering, you’ll probably be able to find her through your friends. You also might be surprised who pops up on your “suggested friends” tab. I actually did this recently and the girl I was looking for was the fourth profile down.
If you met at a bar, or club or in public, this is obviously a lot trickier. But at this point, it’s your only option, so you’ll need to work with what you have.
I hear you ask right about now.
Well, I would submit that this the world we live in now. It’s how we meet people and catalogue our acquaintances.
A lot of it is also in how you approach it. Confidence is key. And you can show that through casual honesty. When asked how you found their profile you can reply with;
Again, if you’ve built up the right amount of sexual tension with a girl before hand, this won’t come off as that weird. Especially if you don’t make it weird. Be confident and do away with your fear of loss.
Now, you don’t want to just keep talking in Facebook chat. Like all flirting, you want to escalate and create greater investment. Remember, your first goal is still to get her number, but your ultimate goal is to get her out on a date.
So at this point you also want to reverse the power dynamic in your favour. You’ve been chasing her up until this point and too much of that will make her lose interest. You’ll look too needy.
You need to start sending out the vibe of, “I don’t need you. I want you.”
To do this, you give her your number, and playfully invite her to text you.
Then, you want to end your Facebook conversation and wait for her to text you. Be cool. Be patient. It might take a day or two, but no matter what, don’t message her on that Facebook conversation again.
If you’ve done your job, then that text and her phone number are on the way.
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About David Maitland David Maitland is a writer living in Vancouver, Canada.