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How To Make Your Girlfriend Happy

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You can keep the fire burning in your relationship

Why is that lust peaks in the early period of a relationship, then tends to fade the longer you stay together?

Is it possible to keep your girlfriend giddy with love and affection throughout your relationship? 

Or are all couples doomed to experience the ‘end of the honeymoon’ and the apathy that comes with it?  

The truth is: it’s natural for humans to be excited by ‘newer’ things and take long-standing situations for granted. 

But that doesn’t mean we have to helplessly accept it. 

It is possible to extend this excitement throughout a romantic relationship. It’s just that most guys either don’t know how, or don’t think it’s necessary.

They get comfortable and oftentimes lazy in their relationship, and that’s when their woman’s happiness begins to wane. It’s often at this point that she stops doing the things that excited you so much. 

Your relationship may not be instantly doomed once the ennui settles in. Many women remain in comfortable yet mediocre relationships for years. Often, they’ll rationalise that the initial spark has been replaced by a ‘deeper’ sense of admiration.

This may well be true – but it would be naive to believe that she doesn’t miss these feelings of excitement. 

In fact, many affairs are fuelled solely by a new person providing that emotional ‘spark’. 

It’s not uncommon for people to risk a stable relationship – and oftentimes their marriage – in a bid to experience this spark once more.

Even when there is a lot to lose, this happens time and again.

So, the question is: how can you create a deeper emotional connection while keeping the initial excitement of a relationship burning strong? 

How to make your girlfriend feel special  

Most articles about how maintaining a happy relationship focus on making your girlfriend feel loved and appreciated. 

Although these bold romantic gestures aren’t recommended during the courtship phase, they’re a fantastic way to please your girlfriend. 

They’re also great for creating a deeper emotional connection. Your partner will feel incredibly special and will love boasting to her friends about what a thoughtful and generous boyfriend she has. 

So, here are some ideas for how to make her feel this way:

  • Small gestures that show she is on your mind. Send sweet text messages or leave small notes. Pick up her favorite snack from the supermarket. Buy her roses. Run her a flower petal bath after a stressful day at work.   
  • Build her up. Compliment her. Encourage her to pursue her dreams. Inspire her to improve herself.  
  • Dedicate time to her. Take on her dates that you know she’d like. Listen to her problems. Spend time getting to know her friends and family. Accompany her to important events.   
  • Unique and thoughtful gifts. Write her a poem or a song. Create a collage of your travel photos.  
  • Grand gestures.  Buy jewellery or designer fashion items. Whisk her away on holiday. These gestures aren’t just about spoiling her. They’re an honest indicator of your dedication to her. 

How to keep the emotional spark in your relationship

Sadly, thoughtful and caring gestures on their own won’t always be enough to keep your girlfriend happy. 

In fact, if you can’t provide a woman with the same emotional spikes that won her over, these gestures are often taken for granted.

The guide below suggests how to spark a woman’s emotions, so she remains as attracted to you as she was in the ‘honeymoon phase’. 

In many places, this guide will suggest you do the opposite of what your woman asks.

This might seem counter-intuitive. Indeed, most men will take the simple option of doing what their partner wants, rather than what she needs for the electricity to remain alive in the relationship.  

That’s why most men end up in relationships without any passion or excitement within a few months. 

With that said, let’s dive in. 

Stand up for yourself

During the courtship phase, it’s likely a woman will throw shit tests at you to determine whether you’re confident and assured enough to handle her. 

It’s a running joke within the seduction community that her pussy will tickle every time you pass these tests. 

After all, to pass a woman’s tests, you’ll need to develop strong boundaries, be secure with yourself and remain confident in your value. These are all attractive qualities. 

The problem is: women keep throwing these shit tests when they’re in a relationship – and a lot of guys buckle at this point.

Perhaps she will:   

  • ask you to cancel important plans to spend more time with her; 
  • make unreasonable demands about who you can spend time with; 
  • make ultra-demanding requests for gifts or favors;   
  • throw a tantrum or belittle you when she doesn’t get her way. 

It might seem like doing whatever your girlfriend wants will make her happy. Perhaps it will in the short-term. However, once she realises you’re a doormat who always gives into her demands, she’ll lose respect for you.   

When you stick to your personal boundaries, she gets to continue feeling the tickle of you passing her shit tests. 

That’s better for your relationship in the long run.

Remain focused on your mission

Women tend to be attracted to ambitious men, who remain focused on the path to realising their goals.

However, it’s common for men to slow (or give up on) their journey to achieving their life’s mission once they find a girlfriend.

Perhaps he becomes lazy because hanging out with his girlfriend is easier and more immediately satisfying. Maybe it’s because he’s giving in to her demands on his time. It could even be that he was faking ambition in order to win her over. 

Either way, dampening your ambition is a great way to make your girlfriend less attracted to you. 

David Deida explains it fantastically in his book ‘The Way Of The Superior Man’. 

He says: “A man’s highest purpose is his priority, not his intimacy. Your woman knows this. Deep inside, she really wants it to be this way.” 

Continue levelling up

There’s nothing that makes a relationship stale like a man letting himself go.

When this happens, not only does his woman become less attracted to him physically, she also senses that no other women are likely to want him either. 

At this point, she feels no motivation to impress him. She either leaves him for someone more ambitious, or stays and lets herself turn to shit as well.

The irony of this is that a woman will often encourage her man to slack off. She’ll persuade him to skip the gym or stop working on his business so he can spend more time with her. It’s another example of where doing what she wants is harmful to the relationship in the long run.

To keep your girlfriend happy, it’s better to continue improving yourself – physically, emotionally, intellectually and financially. 

Remain on your path to greatness. This might mean turning down the occasional lazy Sunday morning in bed with her – and perhaps this upsets her in that moment. 

But, in return, she gets the long-term satisfaction of a relationship with a man who keeps becoming more amazing.

This will hopefully inspire her to keep showing you the best version of herself. You grow together and remain attracted to each other. Everybody wins!  

Romantic gestures mean more when you’re a high-value guy  

Yes, it’s important to make nice gestures that make your girlfriend feel loved and appreciated. But when you maintain the emotional spark by following the advice above, these gestures have a greater impact. 

Imagine that some old unkempt woman compliments you on the street. Now, imagine a Victoria’s Secret Model giving you the same compliment a couple of minutes later. The second compliment will probably hold more value to you. 

That’s exactly how a woman feels when you make romantic gestures. When you’re a man who is moving forward in life, taking care of himself and sticking to his personal boundaries, the romantic gestures mean so much more. 

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About Joe Elvin Joe Elvin travels the world working remotely as a lifestyle writer and confidence coach. Throughout 2017, he filmed his entire dating life as part of a national television documentary in the UK. His new book 'The Camera Never Lies' details the brutal truths about dating and relationships learned from this experience. You can learn more about the book and download the first chapter for free by clicking here >>

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