When She Wants to Bring a Friend to Your Date
You’ve put in the hard work and secured a date- but now your date is asking you if she can bring a friend along. What does this mean? Is it time to lower your expectations?
Maybe she was never interested in you, or maybe she is having second thoughts. Perhaps she misinterpreted and didn’t realise that you wanted to go on a proper date. No matter the exact reason, her asking to bring a friend to your date is a bad sign. She is trying to make your date entirely platonic. There is an exception to this explanation- read on to find out- but in general, it’s because she doesn’t want to date you.
A woman with manners is not going to turn up to a date with a friend in tow. She’ll ask you first, typically in a text message because it’s an awkward subject to broach. When she asks if you’d mind her bringing a friend (or a few friends), don’t agree to it. Steer it back into becoming a date by saying “actually, I was hoping it would be just the two of us”. It’s not as rude as outright saying “no, that’s not okay”, and it makes your intentions clear. Then, there are three possible outcomes. She will agree to go on a date with you, or she will tell you she’s not interested in you, or she will make an excuse and cancel. The last two possibilities are the same- either means she is not interested. While it may seem like a step backwards- you’ve gotten the date and now you’re risking it being cancelled- it’s better than wasting your time on a date with someone who does not have a romantic interest in you.
If you’ve met online, or even if she doesn’t know you very well, you could be an axe murderer for all she knows. Some women like to bring a friend on the first date just to make sure that you are who you say you are.
This is probably not the most logical way to do things. If she really wants a friend to supervise her, she could ask her friend to surreptitiously sit behind you in the movies or at the next table at the restaurant, so you would never find out she’s being chaperoned. But that’s beside the point. If she’s most comfortable bringing a friend along, there are some situations in which you should understand and go along with it. You won’t be getting any action on that first meet up- treat it as a chance to get to know her. Then, if you have a spark and neither of you turned out to be an axe murderer, you can schedule a proper date. This is quite a bit of effort to go to, so don’t bother if you’re not sure if you’re keen on her.
About Natasha Abrahams Natasha Abrahams is a writer and journalism student from Melbourne, Australia. When she is not busy with being a principal writer on Weekendnotes or skipping lectures, she can be found emptying her wallet at the nearest shopping centre. You can read more from Natasha at: http://mensstyleandfashion.com/