5 Powerful Signs Of Masculinity


There is a drastic shortage of masculinity among modern men. 

  • In a 2016 YouGov poll, British men were asked to rate themselves on a scale of “completely masculine” to “completely feminine”.  Just 2% of 18 to 24-year-olds rated themselves as “completely masculine”, compared to 56% of men over 65. 
  • In a 2020 study, one in three young men (aged 18 to 24) reported having experienced NO sexual activity in the past year. That represented a significant increase compared to the start of the decade. 
  • In August 2020, OnlyFans had 1.2 million content creators (primarily female sex workers) and 50 million paying users (primarily men). In December 2020, OnlyFans founder Tim Stokely stated that its user base was growing at a rate of 500,000 per day.

It could easily be argued this is a drought of society’s own making. 

The latest generations of young men have been constantly fed narratives about ‘toxic masculinity’ and #MeToo, which do have some important messages, but have also become weapons for anything women don’t like about male behavior. 

Even so, the truth is: women still want a masculine presence in their life. This is what they crave more than money, looks or a new pair of Louboutins.

So, if you can be the guy that fulfils that craving, it can do a lot to help you stand out as an attractive man. 

In this guide, we’ll explore 5 important qualities that will highlight your masculinity and make you more attractive to the opposite sex. 


The ability to lead is a defining trait of masculinity. Masculine energy leads, while feminine energy follows. 

That’s partly why women find men in high corporate positions so attractive. 

Money helps, but it’s the power to lead that can be even more of a turn-on.

While it’s not crucial for you to have gained a leadership role professionally, you need to have it  socially. 

Women will notice when you’re the one who leads your social circle and decides what everyone is going to do – and they’ll often battle to date the leader of their group.  

At the very least, be the leader on your dates and in your romantic relationships. Organise your dates, decide where you’re going, tell her when to show up and what to wear.

A feminine woman will be naturally drawn to a man who does this. 


The manner in which you lead is also important for you to be determined as a force of masculinity. 

It’s a deeply masculine trait for you to be assertive in your decision-making, rather than hesitant or unsure of yourself. 

An assertive man makes a woman feel comfortable and safe in his presence. He is her rock. She doesn’t need to worry about anything when he’s around, so she’s free to relax and focus on embracing her feminine qualities.


Groundedness is another staple of masculinity. 

A feminine being tends to be emotionally-driven. The ups and downs of her day could be more volatile than the cryptocurrency market. 

Yet, a masculine being is unmoved by drama. He remains calm and logical in spite of what’s thrown at him. This is another key part of being a woman’s rock. 

When women act bratty or throw a shit test at you, it’s commonly suggested they’re doing this sub-consciously to test your groundedness. 

That’s why it’s such a turn-on when you pass these tests.

David Deida explained it brilliantly in his famous book on masculinity ‘The Way Of The Superior Man’.

He said: “The most erotic moment for a woman is feeling that you are Shiva, the divine masculine: unperturbable, totally loving, fully present, and all-pervading.”


Of course, bravery is a masculine trait. 

That’s why it’s mostly men who fight in wars, accept dangerous jobs, take on roles as CEOs and protect their partners from danger. 

While a woman probably doesn’t want a man who is endlessly starting fights (as that’s hardly emotionally grounded), she does want a man who isn’t afraid of conflict. 

You should be willing to stand up for yourself in a disagreement with anyone, especially your partner herself. 

The best way to up your bravery is to prepare yourself as best you can for physical combat. Then, you won’t fear situations when you need to use it. That means building muscle in the gym and/or learning a martial art.

In relationship dissputes, it’s important to not fear your partner leaving. This leaves you in a horrible position for negotiations. Build your attractiveness, so that you feel confident in your ability to attract a new partner if things break down with this woman.   

Embracing Tension

A telltale sign of a grounded man is his ability to embrace tension.

A masculine man can sit within tension without flinching. A feminine man becomes an emotional wreck at the first sign of it. 

The fear of tension is one of the biggest causes of approach anxiety.

A lot of guys fear those first few awkward moments when the woman isn’t sure of them yet, motre than the potential for being rejected.

If you’re one of them, the best cure is exposure therapy. 

When you’re going out to meet women, challenge yourself to remain in the interaction for at least two minutes, or until she decides to leave. 

This exercise will help you become more comfortable with tension, compared to bailing out of an interaction when it gets slightly awkward. It’ll teach you the ability to plow through and turn more bad interactions into good ones too. 

How To Boost Your Masculinity

You might think that masculinity is something you either have, or don’t have. 

But that’s not true. 

For starters, testosterone levels are commonly linked to masculine behaviors and it’s possible to boost these by eating specific foods, working out or artificially injecting it into you (TRT). Here are some more ways to boost your testosterone naturally

It’s also likely that practicing and mastering the art of cold-approach pick-up will help you to embrace all of the masculine behaviors listed above.

These women you’re out meeting will ruthlessly train you to embrace these behaviors like a dog. 

Whenever you show clear signs of masculinity, they’ll be attracted and will reward you with attention and physical affection.

Whenever you instead decide to: 

  • be a submissive ‘nice guy’ 
  • let the woman make all the decisions
  • be passive, instead of assertive
  • not make a move in case she doesn’t like it

…they will be repulsed and ruthlessly punish you. 

Hopefully, even the weakest most feminine man will eventually learn his lesson. After they get beaten down enough by the women they want. 

It might be uncomofrtable developing masculine traits especially in this new woke society, but it’s nowhere near as uncomfortable as being brutally rejected by women again and again. And that’s what will happen if you can’t act like a man around them. 

If he commits to practicing cold-approach for long enough, a weak-willed male will learn the error of his ways and start acting like a man. 

Only once you do this will you begin to attract the women you deserve. 

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About Joe Elvin Joe Elvin travels the world working remotely as a lifestyle writer and confidence coach. Throughout 2017, he filmed his entire dating life as part of a national television documentary in the UK. His new book 'The Camera Never Lies' details the brutal truths about dating and relationships learned from this experience. You can learn more about the book and download the first chapter for free by clicking here >>