Do Women Like Virgins?

Does Being A Virgin Matter?

When most guys are asked ?do women like virgins??, their immediate answer is ?no?.

But they?d be wrong.

If you?re inexperienced, it’s easy to believe that dating is some kind of impossible puzzle and that women have unbelievably high standards.

It’s easy to believe that you don?t measure up.

In fact, if you?re a virgin, and it?s not out of choice, I?d wager you believe all of those things.

We?re constantly sold images of ripped guys, and presented with films where men have unshakeable confidence.

This is how we think we have to behave.

But when we?re insecure, out of shape, and generally inexperienced with women – it may as well be impossible for us to act that way.

So we think – ?No women would ever like me. I am virgin and that?s that.?

I know because when I was much younger, that’s exactly how I felt.

Well, the truth is that everything you?ve been taught is wrong. And when you understand them, women are much nicer than you?d think.

The Reality Of Female Attraction

The easiest way to understand why it doesn?t matter if you?re a virgin is to understand what women find attractive in a man.

A lot of places will say that it?s your looks, your money, or your status that women are attracted to, despite the fact that nightclubs are littered with decent looking rich guys going home alone.

Why is this?

The answer is that women don?t look for what people say they look for.

What they actually look for is someone who makes them feel something.

This is why a lot of guys who are experienced with women will tell you this:

You can do anything to a woman except bore her.

Being bored isn?t so much a feeling as it is an absence of feeling. This is, in many ways, the heart of seduction.

Any feeling what-so-ever + arousal = The magic formula of seduction

The facts about your identity are just icing on the cake. Rich, successful, interesting, tall, chiseled or even broke and a virgin.

These are just details. What she feels is far, far, far important.

But if this is true, why does being a virgin bother virgins so much?

Why Does Being A Virgin Bother You So Much?

The easiest answer is because society shames men who are virgins.

Hell, there?s even been a movie made specifically designed to laugh at them. I mean, sure, he was 40, but it doesn?t matter.

In every guy?s mind, there?s a culturally instilled belief that says ?virgin = bad?.

Which means, if you?re a virgin, you?re going to be hyper-conscious of the fact that you?re a virgin.

It?s pretty shitty.

Another reason is that not only do you care that society is shaming you, but off the back of that, you?re afraid of what you feel that implies about you.

You?re afraid of how this will affect your chances of losing your virginity moving forward.

This is why virgins are often the most afraid of losing their virginity, even though they want to lose it the most.

Virgins are walking around terrified of being exposed as virgins.

But this is wrong.

Being A Virgin Doesn’t Matter – But Here’s What Does

Being a virgin doesn?t matter. The sooner you realize this the better.

First, it?s hard to tell if someone is a virgin, so worrying if people will suddenly find out is stupid.

Second, whether you?re a virgin or not has nothing to do with the results you can get. The results you can get are a result of your behavior.

Third, the reason you?re a virgin is a result of the behavioral choices you?ve made up until now.

Don?t believe me?

Imagine you were the most attractive version of yourself, and for whatever reason, you weren?t feeling anxious or sexually repressed.

Do you think it?s likely you?d end up eventually meeting a girl you?d like and having sex?

Imagine you were half as attractive as that person, and you were kind of feeling anxious and sexually repressed, but you?d started hanging around with more girls.

Do you think it?s likely you?d end up eventually meeting a girl you?d like and having sex?

Your problem isn?t your virginity. Your problem is your anxiety, sexual repression, and the number of girls you spend time with.

That last one is the biggest.

No guy, no matter how confident he is, get?s laid if he doesn?t speak to any girls.

Instead of worrying about your virginity, worry about being a little more sexually and socially outgoing, and eventually, your virginity will take care of itself.

This kind of thinking is what will lead you to start getting experience.

You?re solving the problem, not trying to hide the symptom.

And once you?ve got that experience, you?ll have fundamentally changed the way you exist in the world.

The Problem With Asking Whether Women Like Virgins

If you asked a selection of women whether they liked virgins or wanted to date one, many would say no.

But when really probed, almost all would say they didn?t care.

Aside from understanding that women just want a guy who makes them feel something, you need to understand two things:

  1. Her standards aren?t as high as you think they are. Her standards are just a guy who takes care of himself and his life and is generally pretty happy.
  2. She?s slept with people uglier and more boring than you.

Hammer both of those into your head with a chisel.

Your real problem is that you’re fundamentally misunderstanding women.

They don?t care about your virginity because they?re more wrapped up in how they feel.

Just as you?re wrapped up in your own feelings of anxiety, she?s sitting there wondering ?does he like me??, ?do I feel comfortable?? – and so and so forth.

Women aren?t aliens. They?re just like you.

In fact, they?re so similar you that should find it liberating.

They have the same anxieties, fears, and insecurities as you – the only difference is they want you to take the lead.

Because if you?re not comfortable, they won?t be either.

Just a woman cares far more about how you make her feel, how you feel about being a virgin matters far more than the fact you are a virgin.

The facts are irrelevant, the feelings are everything.

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About John Matich John is a writer from the UK who splits his time between travelling the world and trying to find unconventional solutions to dating and personal development. You can find more from him at

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