Hacking the Friendzone

How to Make the Friendzone Your Key to Friends with Benefits


Talking to women, especially attractive ones, can feel a lot like that long walk to the principal?s office when you got in trouble in school as a kid.

The whole time you are imagining how bad its going to be, how your parents are going to be pissed, and getting your ass whooped when you get home…

?but the answer isn?t trying to self-talk your way into false confidence.

I mean, who are you fooling anyway? Women can tell when it?s genuine and when it?s not. If you don?t believe the self-talk, you?re lying to yourself and it won?t work.

The key to unlocking your confidence has been right under your nose this whole time but you?ve been intentionally avoiding it like that homework assignment you kept putting off until never.

If she?s HOT put her in the FRIENDZONE

That?s right, I said it.

All this fear of the friendzone is just giving you one more thing to worry about?

?one more thing to question every step of the way?

So man up! Reach under the bed, grab the boogeyman by his balls, and pull that little bitch out so he can?t scare you anymore!

You?re probably thinking, ?Huh? Why would I do that? Keenan, she?s HOT!? Well, let me give you a little dose of counter-intuitive strategy from a guy who?s been there. Consider this:

How many hot girls do you know that you have absolutely no intention of sleeping with?

The answer is NONE because they?re hot and, hey, let?s face it: we?re men.

So, hot girl = attraction zone.

Yet, by putting her in the friendzone you completely disarm her from rejecting you.? She can?t reject you because you already put her in her place as ?Just a friend?.? This is a prime opportunity for you to get to know exactly how a beautiful woman thinks.

She will share her secrets with you?

?her weaknesses with you?

?and you?ll start to realize that she is a human just like you.

Since you guys are friends, and she knows ?you would never do anything to ruin that? she is on YOUR team now.? Your friend with NO BENEFITS will be your key to making friends with benefits.


Beautiful women get more offers for dick in a day than you can imagine.? It?s like everywhere she goes, there?s some guy on a bike with a nametag stopping her to ask if she?d like to talk about the book of his dick and how it?ll deliver her soul into eternal salvation…

?Except it?s every guy everywhere she goes?

?The McDonald?s guy at the drive-through window, ?Would you like a side of dick with that; I can super-size it for you?? ?

?Working out at the gym, ?Hey do you need a spot?? How about some dick??

You could imagine how quickly it gets old and most of the guys who try to approach women are not smooth at all.

There are even the guys who try to play the long game and pose as a friendly for a while just to get in their pants. This almost always inevitably leads to them blowing their cover and trying to offer some of that ?friend dick? ?

?How bout some dick just as friends to help you get over your ex? You know?because I care about you? as a friend.?


If you hung out with more women and didn?t try to sleep with them, you?d know that.? She feels tension just like you do but for different reasons.? She is worried that like all her other guy friends, you?re just trying to get in her pants.

But, by putting HER in YOUR friendzone FIRST, you?ve become a breath of fresh air for her.? You actually enjoy her company and don?t just want to get in her pants. For her, that?s a relief and she?ll open up to you. She?ll let you into her inner circle.

You ever wonder why hot girls always have a gay friend?? Because he is the only guy in her life who isn?t trying to get in her pants.? That gay friend knows all her sexual fantasies, the type of guys she?s attracted to and why her last relationship failed because he has gained passage to her inner circle.

If you don?t try to get in her pants, then you can get into her inner circle WITHOUT BEING THE GAY FRIEND.? (Do not pretend to be gay!)


There are a couple ways to establish your intentions depending on your situation.

Preferably this hot girl isn?t just some stranger off the street, but she could literally be anyone who you?ve had some sort of consistent, casual interactions with?

  • ?the hot barista who makes small talk at the coffee shop you stop at on your way to work?.
  • ?the pretty girl in your philosophy class?
  • ?even a coworker* because you are looking for a friend.

* Do NOT make sexual advances on your coworkers or you will be fired for sexual harassment and Van is not liable for you being a dumbass!

Whoever she is just keep it casual.? I?ve got a bunch of scripts for pretty much any situation, but essentially something like this:

You: ?Hey.? You?re really attractive so I don?t want you to get the wrong idea because I?m sure guys hit on you all the time.? I think you?re really (cool, smart, motivated, fun) and I was wondering if you wanted to be just friends and (hangout, grab coffee, workout, study) sometime??.

Her: ?Yah that sounds great!? I?m free on (whatever day) ?lets meet up.?

The keys here are that the compliment you give her is casual and friendly: cool, smart, motivated; and not pretty, sexy, your booty smells nice, send nice pick of your bobs or anything like that.

Also, the activity that you invite her to will be casual as well: coffee, homework, study; and not drinks, dinner, movie, sex party in your basement on Friday.

Relate the compliment you give her and the activity you suggest to however you know each other. Keep it casual and hang out with her just as friends.

So, why the hell is this dating advice?

What?s going to end up happening?assuming that you don?t try to hit on her the first time you guys go out drinking and ruin everything?you?re going to overcome your fear of interacting with beautiful women.

She will introduce you to her friends who are single and ACTIVELY TRY TO HOOK YOU UP WITH THEM because she?ll have nothing but good things to say about you to her single friends.

Since you?re just friends, you can test out cheesy pickup lines on her, ask her sex tips, things that turn her off, etc.? If you are out with a group of hot girls, just as friends, you become more desirable to other women.? A hot girl or group of hot women can be the perfect wingman.

Being seen with attractive women makes you more desirable to other women.

Here are a few more PRO TIPS:

  • If you can?t find a hot friend with NO benefits then sign up for a Zumba class, go consistently, and high-five people at the end of every class. Lots of hot women do Zumba.? Lots of men don?t. Go make friends.


  • It may become difficult to keep her in the friendzone because deliberately making yourself unavailable to her and allowing her to open up to you, can build attraction. Everyone wants what they can?t have and if you are strict about not letting her out of the friendzone, she may at some point realize that she wants you.? If this happens, let her make the move first.? Remember, YOU put HER in the friendzone.? If she decides she wants out, you get to make the call.? Do not put her in the friendzone with the hope that this will happen, because you?ll likely screw it up before it does.


  • If she says something like ?I have a boyfriend? when you ask her to be friends just tell her, ?Perfect, I?m gay… Not really, but I don?t want you thinking I?m trying to get in your pants. If you don?t want to be friends that?s cool.? I respect your relationship.? I?ll just catch you around?.


  • Just because she is a friend DOES NOT mean you treat her like one of the boys. Treat her like your female friend.? The whole point of this is to get to know her, so don?t drag her to guy stuff unless she?s into it.? Go find out what she likes to do and go do those things.

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About Van Bender Van Bender is a writer and coach specializing in becoming the alpha, the art of attraction and hacking the friendzone. Check out my website and subscribe for exclusive content Dayonedating.com

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