Why Relationships Are Hard To Maintain These Days
Maintaining a long-term relationship isn’t as easy as it used to be.
The dating game has changed – and most of these changes aren’t in the average man’s favor.
In fact, they aren’t in the favor of anyone who wants to remain in a stable and monogamous partnership.
However, that doesn’t mean all hope is lost.
It’s still possible to remain in a happy couple throughout the 2020s and beyond.
The first step to achieving this is to be aware of why relationships are hard to maintain these days. From there, you can take active steps to overcome these hurdles.
Below, we’ll list the problems that are destroying modern relationships and the solutions to help you continue to thrive with a loving partner.
These trends not only make couples more likely to break up, they also make it so both men and women remain single for longer. As such, they have helped to create the ‘hook-up culture’ we’re experiencing in 2020 and beyond.
Although it’s harder to remain in a long-term relationship in the modern era, it’s easier for an attractive man to enjoy a bachelor lifestyle. If you’re enjoying this lifestyle and have no plans to stop, kudos to you sir!
Nevertheless, this article aims to help men find and stay in a monogamous relationship. Here are the main trends stopping this from happening.
The abundance of online dating matches that attractive people can collect often creates a ‘grass is greener’ syndrome that prevents them from settling into relationships.
However, there is another factor which specifically elevates women’s standards of who they’re willing to date.
This is the fact that so many men are willing to ‘date down’ when offered the prospect of quick-and-easy hook-ups from Tinder and other apps.
This leads to almost every Plain Jane getting hundreds of flattering messages and invitations from guys who are ‘out of her league’. She’s probably getting similar comments on her Instagram pictures too.
These men might have no intention of a serious relationship with her, but they still skew her self-perception so that she only considers dating upper-tier guys in the future. As such, the ‘Average Joes’ are left with no-one to date except the dregs of the dating pool.
This might primarily appear to be a problem which stops people finding partners in the first place – but the perceived ease of replacing a partner with someone better certainly contributes to the downfall of relationships too.
Although it would be unfair to say the feminism movement itself is directly responsible for the rise in failed relationships, it has played its part in the following problems.
As you can now see, there are many reasons why women are developing higher standards for who they’d date. For these same reasons, they’re also less accepting of humdrum relationships. Good for them! It would be wrong for anyone to begrudge women this.
As men, it’s therefore our job to become better. The bar has raised and we need to raise with it.
This isn’t just about becoming the type of man that women want to date. It’s also about remaining that man throughout your relationship.
A lot of men see a long-term relationship as an excuse to let themselves go. Yet, the truth is: there’s no room for complacency. Women are less tolerant than ever of partners who they view as beneath them.
This state of affairs is a good thing. It will encourage you to keep striving for excellence in various areas of life, to keep chasing the best version of yourself, to keep winning your partner over.
If you’ve found a good woman, she’ll be inspired to do the same. Instead of letting herself go, she’ll remain the same feminine vixen who initially seduced you, even if it’s only out of fear that she’ll lose you otherwise.
As unhealthy as this sounds, this is what women want from their partner. They want to date upwards, even if it does make them a little insecure.
It’s this full bouquet of emotions that keeps the fire burning in a relationship. The highs of remaining in awe of her man. The lows from wondering whether she’s still good enough for him (even though he does everything he can to show he loves her). This is infinitely more exciting than the average chump, who she knows will never leave her. Sure, this type of ‘stable’ couple is commonplace. Yet, in this new dating era of female power and instant smartphone-fuelled gratification, it’s more important than ever that the excitement remains in a relationship.
If you can be man enough to create it, this is your best shot at remaining in a happy partnership.
About Joe Elvin Joe Elvin travels the world working remotely as a lifestyle writer and confidence coach. Throughout 2017, he filmed his entire dating life as part of a national television documentary in the UK. His new book 'The Camera Never Lies' details the brutal truths about dating and relationships learned from this experience. You can learn more about the book and download the first chapter for free by clicking here >>