How To Get Girls In 2020
Dating is changing in a big way.
We’re moving towards an environment where the best guys will be sleeping with even more girls, and the chumps will find it even harder to get laid
While it’s already suggested that the top 20% of men are nailing the top 80% of women, you can expect this ratio to skew even further in the favor of high-value guys (if it hasn’t already).
The reason for this is reach.
In 2020, an attractive guy can easily contact the hottest women in any location. It only takes a quick search of the top photos on Instagram, and a cheeky slide in the DMs of whoever catches his eye. If he’s also got Tinder Plus running, he could have hundreds of leads before he even arrives in the city.
Women are being inundated with compliments and invitations on these apps, and it’s warping their standards for who’s good enough to date them.
A decade or so ago, if you wanted to date a woman, you’d perhaps only need to be better than the men she hangs out with. Now, you also need to be better than her Tinder matches and the guys in her DMs.
Consider this your warning. If you’re not getting laid enough now, it’s going to get worse – unless you start taking steps to improve yourself.
The good news is: it doesn’t take as much effort as you think to launch yourself into the top percentiles of men in your city.
Most guys are useless with women – and the advent of online dating is arguably making that worse. A lot of men choose to rely on smartphone apps, rather than learning how to overcome approach anxiety, flirt and seduce a woman in real life.
If you can learn these skills, that’ll put you way ahead of most guys.
This guide presents a comprehensive list of what it takes to be an attractive man in 2020. Follow these tips and it could be you who has the pick of all the women in any city.
There are two main steps to living a fulfilling dating life. The first step is to become the type of guy who women want to date. The second step is to meet women and showcase yourself in a way that they find attractive.
This section suggests some of the qualities you’ll want to develop to make yourself more attractive to women.
Sort out your image
So many guys are caught up in the myth that women only care about looks and money. Many use this myth as an excuse not to approach women at all. Yet, it’s simply not true.
However, your appearance will help you get your foot in the door. So, here are some simple pointers for improving your image.
While men primarily experience attraction visually, women primarily experience it emotionally.
That’s a key reason why your appearance isn’t too important. It’s also why you should learn how to spike a woman’s emotions in an attractive way.
This should involve positive emotional spikes through flirting, kino, compliments and humor. But it’s important to balance this with negative spikes, perhaps through teasing, disqualifiers or revealing sad personal stories.
A high-value guy has a lot going on in his life. Hobbies. Friends. Professional pursuits. In many cases, he’s dating multiple women.
There’s no need for him to dedicate too much energy to a woman he’s just met.
When a guy over-invests in a woman, she gets the impression that he doesn’t have much else to excite him in life. It’s a massive turn-off.
There is loads of advice available about how to not appear needy. Here are some basic pointers.
The list goes on and on…
Honestly though, when you have a cool life with lots of stuff going on, you’ll follow these rules naturally and won’t need to play any mind games.
This should be your aim.
Yes, it’s 2020 and the feminist narrative is telling women to be completely independent in all walks of life.
Deep down, they still want a man who can take care of them. It’s biological. Most women are looking out for a man who is capable of raising and supporting a family.
They certainly don’t want a boyfriend who needs to be mothered throughout their relationship.
You want to show your leadership skills from the offset, by taking the onus when it comes to organising a date and escalating to a physical relationship.
Women are attracted to confidence, because it shows you believe you deserve her.
A woman will test your confidence by throwing shit tests throughout your interactions, so it’s worth learning how to pass these.
Leading, as described above, will do a lot to showcase your confidence.
On top of this, take care to never be apologetic or insecure about your desires or feelings.
As you get your life together, learn what women want and start regularly dating hotties, these actions come naturally.
Don’t make the mistake of overdoing it, perhaps by acting overly brash. Men tend to do this when they don’t think they’re good enough as they are.
Social proof is one of the most obvious indicators that you’re a high-value guy. If you’re adored by cool guys and hot women, that’s a clear sign there’s something cool about you.
All humans use social proof to make decisions about people and products. We don’t always have time to do our own detailed research into these sorts of things. That’s why we’ll choose Coca-Cola, Starbucks and Amazon ahead of some unknown competitor.
Women are particularly prone to using social proof when choosing who to date. After all, if a woman doesn’t know a guy and he appears to have no cool friends, there’s little to prove he’s not creepy, socially unaware or even dangerous.
If a guy does have a lot of cool friends, a woman could boost her social status by dating him. A lot of women will be very excited about this.
If you have lots of cool friends, get invited to tons of fun events and have access to cool stuff, that’ll make people want to hang out with you. Yes, money helps here, but not if you flaunt it an unattractive way.
If you have a passion project that takes up a lot of your time, this tends to be seen as attractive. Women like ambitious men.
Ideally, you have at least one hobby which you like to do. If it’s something she likes, that’s a bonus. Even if she has no interest in it, she likes to see that you have something outside of her that makes you happy.
As disheartening as it sounds, you could have all of the above going for you, and it’s still not enough on its own.
Perhaps you know a guy who is rich, good-looking and active, but still sucks with women. (If you don’t, I assure you they’re out there. They’re the ones who pay $3,000+ for pick-up artist bootcamps.)
The missing ingredient is how they present themselves to women. The following guidelines will help ensure you’re presenting yourself in the most attractive way possible.
Yes, there are tons of guys who get laid like a rockstar using online dating. These are mostly the dudes who were blessed with fantastic looks, or have worked to obtain obvious status. If you don’t have these qualities, it may be that online dating is not working well for you.
Thankfully, there is an alternative – and that is talking to women in real life.
There are few men who are good at cold-approaching a woman, starting a conversation, flirting and swapping contact details in a smooth and fun way. By learning how to do this, you come across as particularly confident.
A good cold-approach puts you ahead of the guys in her phone – because you are literally stood in front of her. This face-to-face time makes it far easier to spike her emotions, build genuine chemistry and demonstrate other attractive qualities.
There are many guys who have attractive qualities, but blow it with the opposite sex by showing off.
When you try too hard to display your attractive qualities, it can come across as too needy.
This has historically presented a dilemma for men. As important as it is for women to find out about your attractive qualities, they get turned off if you blatantly boast about them.
Thankfully, a solution for this problem has emerged.
In 2020, Instagram is undoubtedly the most popular social media platform among beautiful women. Most of them are hooked on it.
You can – and should – demonstrate your social proof, active lifestyle and sense of humor in your posts. And you should absolutely be swapping Instagram details with any new women you meet. Not doing this is the dating equivalent of shooting yourself in the foot.
When you show off your attractive qualities on social media, you’re presenting them to everyone, not just her. She just finds out. It’s a more acceptable way of flaunting your attractive qualities.
A strong Instagram profile can transform women who were unsure about you into women who are obsessed with you.
Our full-length guide on using Instagram to attract women explains more.
Most of the tips in this guide can’t be implemented overnight.
However, the more you work on this stuff, the more attractive you become to the opposite sex.
And – with the ease of reaching out to hot women in 2020 and beyond, the sky’s the limit for your dating life.
So, what are you waiting for?
Hit the gym. Practice your social skills. Improve your social circle. Work on your Instagram profile.
It’ll ensure 2020 is the best year of your dating life
About Joe Elvin Joe Elvin travels the world working remotely as a lifestyle writer and confidence coach. Throughout 2017, he filmed his entire dating life as part of a national television documentary in the UK. His new book 'The Camera Never Lies' details the brutal truths about dating and relationships learned from this experience. You can learn more about the book and download the first chapter for free by clicking here >>