How To Approach Women At The Gym (Without Being Creepy)

Most gyms are packed with beautiful women with toned athletic bodies. It?s completely understandable that you want to know how to approach them.

At the same time, it can seem like there?s barely ever a prime opportunity to do so.?

In most cases, these women will be dripping in sweat, completely focused on their workout, or chatting with trainers and the friends they came to the gym with.

On top of that, if you do find a moment to flirt with someone at the gym and it goes badly, you risk developing a reputation as the local pervert.?

It can be frustrating for a single man to have access to these gym hotties, without any idea how to start a conversation with them.

Hopefully, this guide will solve these frustrations once and for all.?

Read on to discover the smoothest way to approach women at the gym and ultimately land a date.????

Why Social Circle Game Works Best At The Gym

Social circle game is a fancy term for the strategy of making friends with as many people as you can in one environment, then using that social proof to attract women to want to date you.

It?s best to use social circle game in any environment where you see the same people over and over again.

That means school, college, social clubs and the workplace, as well as the gym…?

This is because:?

  • Women are attracted to popular men.
  • The friends you make today can help you attract women in several weeks, months or even years, provided you both remain members of that gym.?
  • When everyone appears to know and like you in a certain environment, it becomes so much easier for other people to want to know you too.??
  • If you approach a woman using direct game and it doesn?t go well, it can come off as creepy. There?s every chance that his woman could tell other people about how you creeped her out and ruin your chances of anyone else in that environment wanting to date you.?

With social circle game, your aim is to approach men and women with the aim of making friends. You?re not going to overtly hit on anyone. You?re just going to be a friendly and positive guy who provides value and good energy.

At the gym, you could easily provide value by offering to spot other people, complimenting their form or workout gear, or perhaps by offering tips to help people improve their workout (only if it?s welcomed).

From there, you could transition into a more personal conversation, perhaps about what they like to do for fun in your city.?

Once there is some sort of connection or mutual interest established, go ahead and swap contact details. Perhaps it takes a couple of conversations to get to this point, but there?s no rush if you?re both going to the same gym all the time. Social circle game is a slow-burner, but it pays dividends in the long run. If you try to force a connection too quickly, you can still develop a reputation as a creep, so relax and let connections form naturally.??

Social media is the best tool for building and maintaining a social circle for people you meet in the gym (or anywhere), these days. For more information on why it?s far more effective than swapping phone numbers, see our guide on How To Get Girls Using Instagram.

If you focus on doing this for long enough, you?ll eventually get to the point where everyone at the gym knows and likes you.

When you?re saying ?hi? to everyone at the gym and getting good responses, you better believe that other women will notice that. It will get to the point where they?re expecting (and even hoping) for you to eventually introduce yourself to them.

The conversation is far more likely to go well when they?re in this mindset.?

How To Approach Women At The Gym In A Non-Invasive Way?

Timing is key when it comes to starting conversations at the gym. You?ll want to wait until someone has finished their set, and respect when they want to get back to their workout.

If you begin with a gym-related topic, perhaps by showing curiosity about someone?s equipment or their technique, most people will be happy to share any knowledge they have.?

From there, once you?ve found some common interests, it should be easier to transition into a personal conversation.?

How To Ask Women From The Gym On Dates

Once you have added a woman from the gym on social media, you?ll be able to see the photos and videos she posts about what she does outside of working out. She?ll be able to see yours too. Hopefully, you?re posting plenty of content showcasing a fun and awesome life that women would want to be a part of.?

You can begin commenting on her posts or starting conversations in the DMs about non-gym related topics. Perhaps you find out what she likes to do for fun in your local city. Maybe you bond over mutual interests that you both have.?

By all means, you can ramp up the flirting at this point. After all, you?re not going to be interrupting her workout, nor will you develop a reputation as the guy who only goes to the gym to hit on girls.

In fact, all the potential awkwardness of meeting women at the gym evaporates once you have her contact details. Provided your text message game is on point and she is somewhat attracted to you, there should be little stopping you from getting her on a date at this point.??

There is a strong argument that you?re better off remaining ?just friends? with the women you meet at the gym. If you wanted to do that – or it appears to be your only option because she doesn?t want a date – you could still invite her to parties and use that social proof to attract other women. Our guide on how to meet girls in college has a comprehensive guide on how to leverage your female friends as ?wing-women?.??

How NOT To Approach Women At The Gym: The Key Mistakes To Avoid

Here is a short list of mistakes to avoid at all costs when approaching women at the gym.

Staring at her ass like a pervert

Yes, it?s only natural for men to want to stare when a beautiful woman is doing squats directly in their eyeline.

For whatever reason, we all seem to think we can get away with it without anyone noticing.?

But women tend to have a sixth sense for when men are perving on them from a distance, and it makes them incredibly uncomfortable.?

If you?re caught staring while she?s trying to work out, it?s going to make her less receptive to a conversation when you decide to approach.

This behavior in itself could also lead you to developing a bad reputation.?


If you grunt loudly to show off how hard you?re working, you will catch the attention of women, but none of them are going to be more attracted to you. More likely, they?ll think you?re a moron.??

Starting a conversation in the middle of someone?s set

This is not only bad gym etiquette, it also reveals a huge lack of social awareness. It?s definitely not the way to make someone want to be your friend.?

Giving unsolicited workout tips

This is regularly listed among the most annoying things that other people can do at the gym. Make sure other people are open to critique before you give it.

Flirting too aggressively

Just in case this hasn?t already been made clear, do not flirt too openly at the gym. If the woman isn?t into it, she?s going to be very uncomfortable, and you?ll probably bump into her several times in the future. Worse yet, she could tell other people about how uncomfortable you made her.?

Playing The Long Game At The Gym Is Totally Worth It

It might sound like too much of a hassle to start off as friends with a woman, then to transition into flirting over text or social media, especially if you?re somewhat accomplished at securing one-night stands from the club or online dating.

However, attracting women using social circle game at the gym does have its advantages.

For starters, most guys want to attract women with fit and athletic bodies – and the gym is the easiest place to meet them. Plus, once you?ve built up your reputation as a fun and social guy, it becomes easier to connect with these women, then it would by cold-approaching them at a bar or in the street.

It takes some time to develop this reputation as the coolest guy in this gym, but doing so really pays off in the end.?

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About Joe Elvin Joe Elvin travels the world working remotely as a lifestyle writer and confidence coach. Throughout 2017, he filmed his entire dating life as part of a national television documentary in the UK. His new book 'The Camera Never Lies' details the brutal truths about dating and relationships learned from this experience. You can learn more about the book and download the first chapter for free by clicking here >>

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