Stop Leaving Thirsty Comments
When you leave thirsty comments on Tinder, Instagram and other social media apps, you’re probably doing more damage than you realize.
In most cases, this harms your chances of making a real life connection with the woman in the photo.
But the problems stretch far deeper than that…
Supplicating to women like this can have a seriously unhelpful impact on your self-image. It damages the overall dynamics between men and women too.
Let’s dive deeper.
In 2020, the typical young woman is being flooded with compliments on Instagram and other social media platforms.
If she’s using Tinder or other online dating apps, you can bet she’s being overwhelmed with matches and propositions there too.
So, when you leave her a compliment online, you are not special. You are nothing but a statistic. The next guy who thinks she’s beautiful.
When she reads your comment, she may feel better about herself, but it doesn’t make her feel any better about you.
Let’s say she was hoping to hear from you, perhaps because you hit it off on a night out or she really liked your Tinder profile.
In this case, you should absolutely use social media to communicate with her, but leaving compliments on her latest selfie isn’t the way to go.
For starters, this makes you no different to anyone else. You’re acting the same as every other guy trying to communicate with her. You’re not standing out at all.
Perhaps more importantly though, you’re ruining the ‘thrill of the chase’ for her. Deep down, women love the ups and downs of ‘chasing’ a guy they’re attracted to. They enjoy the rollercoaster of being unsure whether anything is going to happen. When you leave that thirsty comment on her picture, she knows she can have you. This ruins the fun for her, and puts you in the same category as every other guy who wants to have sex with her. By actually giving her the space to chase you, you’re far more likely to pique her interest.
Here are some better ideas for messages that catch a woman’s attention.
If you’ve met women in real life or perhaps connected on Tinder, there’s a chance that your thirsty comments can start a conversation that leads to you meeting up.
It’s by no means the best ‘text game’, but maybe she already liked you enough for this strategy to work.
However, there is an epidemic of thirsty men following ‘Instagram models’ they’ve never met and trying to create meaningful connections online.
This is not a shortcut to finding love. Unless you’re among the top percentiles of high-status or attractive men, it’s a complete waste of time.
Even if you are one of these top-tier guys, you’ll have far more success using online dating or in real-life.
How does it feel when you spend every day scrolling through images of gorgeous women you’ll never meet? How does it feel when you follow and they don’t follow back? How about when you leave a nice comment and it leads nowhere?
These are questions you can only answer for yourself.
Yet, it’s fair to say that these are the behaviors of a ‘fan’, not an equal.
When you behave like beautiful women are above you, it’s common you’ll start to feel that way. Our actions shape our beliefs.
The truth is: instead of numbing yourself with fantasies of hooking up with these women, it’s possible (and far healthier) to start taking steps to being the man they fantasize about.
A great start is to stop supplicating women online. Unfollow all ‘Instagram models’ who you don’t know. Use the time saved to develop yourself into a more attractive man.
A lot of men prefer messaging random women to the prospect of developing their charisma, overcoming approach anxiety and meeting women in real life. Even if the odds of success are far lower in the Instagram DMs, it’s effortless.
Perhaps you’re a man with high self-esteem who also thinks it’s harmless. If she responds, that’s fantastic. Perhaps an easy hook-up is on the way. If not, on to the next.
However, it can also be argued that this widespread strategy of ‘mass right-swiping’ and ‘sliding in the DMs’ is ruining modern dating culture.
When ‘Plain Jane’ gets thirsty messages from hundreds of guys every week, what do you think that does to her self-image? What if some of these guys are way out of her league, but happy to accept her for a quick and anonymous hook-up? What if some of these guys are randomly sending money to her or offering to be her sugar daddy?
Is it fair to say that this might inflate her dating standards way above what she deserves? This study suggests it’s already happening.
In an era where more women are using websites like Twitch and OnlyFans to make money from thirsty men, millions of U.S college students are seeking sugar daddies, and many more are asking for Venmo payments from random guys, this problem looks set to only get worse.
If the global warming epidemic has taught us anything, it’s that not many people care about ‘doing their bit’ for a better world.
Still, it’s worth knowing what’s happening to modern dating culture, and how you may be playing your part.
The term Simp (an abbreviation for Sucker Idolizing Mediocre Pussy) has made its way into mainstream language, such is the prevalence of this behavior.
You can consider a Simp as the modern ‘nice guy’. Neither character will get the girl.
Simp behavior does nothing good for you, the woman or society in general.
So, for the love of all that’s good in the world, please stop leaving thirsty comments from today onwards.
About Joe Elvin Joe Elvin travels the world working remotely as a lifestyle writer and confidence coach. Throughout 2017, he filmed his entire dating life as part of a national television documentary in the UK. His new book 'The Camera Never Lies' details the brutal truths about dating and relationships learned from this experience. You can learn more about the book and download the first chapter for free by clicking here >>