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All posts by Rob J.


    Idiots I Went To College With: Fat Mark

    img Posted December 2, 2009

    ‘The Boys Are Back In Town’ is a song I associate with, not one of my own memories, but with this fat fuck I went to college with named Mark. I met Mark in my freshmen year ...


    Icebreaker Orientation into the Real World

    img Posted November 30, 2009

    Sup seniors! Oh, I’m sorry, let me rephrase that: “Holler!” That’s what you crazy kids are saying these days, right? Right. Okay, so welcome to summer orientation! I’ll b ...


    Living With Integrity: A Parable

    img Posted November 20, 2009

    I once met a woman who didn?t give a fuck. She was so devoid of a fuck to give, it radiated off her. She tattooed it on other people, tattooed it?on the world. I wanted that. ...


    Bill Gates Owes You Cash, Email Him!

    img Posted November 18, 2009

    Windows 7 was your idea, right? I mean, that’s what Microsoft’s advertising is hammering into your skull: you created Windows 7. Well, if that’s the case, then Bill Gates bet ...


    A DuD: The Prom Bomb

    img Posted November 16, 2009

    I started writing the Another Date under Distress (A DuD) column to spotlight my own dating follies and courtship bloopers. And while I have a volume of memories that attest to poo ...


    Hitting a New Level of Drunkenness: Weekend at Bernie’s Drunk

    img Posted November 12, 2009

    Picture Nancy Kerrigan, right after she?d been ?Gilloolyed,? trying to pull off a Travolta-esque strut (circa?Saturday Night Fever). If you can see that, you can see my inebriated ...

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