Texting a Girl: A Guide To Text Message Game

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HowtoWorktheTextMessageGame

Text message has rapidly become the new way of communicating.   And it is clear that if a man wants to become successful with women he must know how to text message.  It is a simple skill, but mastering it is crucial for your early interactions with a woman.

The first, and most important thing you need to understand about text messaging is that all of the same “attraction building” techniques are still just as relevant when communicating over text. This means that you can quickly kill a woman’s interest by texting wrong in the same way that you could kill attraction by being a bad phone conversationalist. Below are some of the common ways you can kill a woman’s interest over text messages:

Common texting mistakes

The first thing you want to do is avoid some of these mistakes that diminish attraction in the woman you’re interacting with.

  • Sending boring text messages like “How’s it going?”  or “What’s up?
  • Always responding too quickly and seeming over eager
  • Trying to have a conversation over text
  • Letting the woman control the flow of texting (i.e. she always ends the back and forth flow)
  • Trying too hard to get her approval

5 “Nice Guy” Texts to Never Send

Text Flirting

Your first several interactions over text message should be light and flirtatious.  Your sole intention during the first few text messages should be to spark her interest and have her waiting for your next text.  And to initiate some good old fashioned text flirting.

The idea is to banter back and forth and leave the interaction on a high note, by either not responding  back, or by ending it with a text like “see you later…”. It is also important to express bits and pieces of your personality in these texts, and avoid being boring at all costs. Keep it light and fun, then jump into serious stuff, and then back to being light and fun.

During the first few text messages you are just trying to demonstrate that you know how to have fun and be social around women. Your text messages should always give off the impression that you live a fun and exciting life. This means you avoid saying things like “I’m bored,” or if she ask what you’re doing answering “Nothing really.”

Instead answer by being interesting, mysterious, and challenging.

What to text?

Text2In the beginning you’re not really looking to set up date right away.  Like I said earlier, you are just looking to demonstrate that you’re a fun and playful guy. So your first few text messages should simply be sent to demonstrate this aspect of your personality… as well as get to see if she is someone that you have any sort of connection with.

Remember, the purpose of texting is to flirt, create a little connection, and get a woman thinking about you.

You want to make them feel like they are missing out by not being with you. And don’t always answer every question they ask.  Keep your texts short as possible, but filled with personality. For instance, if you’re just texting to keep in touch with a woman you could text something like:

“I just got the most fly pair of jeans ever for $12. I’m pumped”

And another important thing to do is to talk to her like the two of you are already friends. This means that you jump right into your texts without having to explain every little aspect of your life.

“My puppy is ridiculous”

So if you’re texting a woman for the first time you can simply text something like:

“Hey what’s up dork?”

Or ask her a question that references something the two of you talked about in your previous meeting. For instance if she told you that she was going to a Bon Jovi concert over the weekend, you could write “So did you throw your panties on stage when he sung ‘I’ll be there for you’?”

We recently compiled a list of what to text a girl to start a conversation with her.  If you have any good ones feel free to add to the list.

How to Make Plans over Text Message

You can text to meet up, but I always advise calling her before the first meet up. This establishes that you are interested in her, and that you are man enough to pick up the phone and call. Once you’ve spoken to her on the phone at least once, it is then ok to attempt to meet up over text.

If you are going to attempt to make plans over text message have a definite idea of what you want to do with her before you send a text. And always make it seem like you are going to have fun either way.

Here are two examples of a good and bad text for meeting up:

Bad:  want to come to museum on tues?

Good:  hitting the museum fine art on tues. buzz me if you get in an artistic mood

Texting Game Plan

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About Bobby Rio

I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences.  For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.

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2 Comments

  1. jenny

    December 11, 2012 at 6:35 am

    i can be yor friend of you like too.ok friend! write it back to me so i will wait you to write back.o friend !

    • jenny

      December 11, 2012 at 6:37 am

      wILL you be my friend yes or no.

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