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The Art of Approaching Women
Ah, the old cold approach.
What would a pick-up artist be without the flashy displays of the skillset he’s developed purely for the purposes of pulling girls and looking like the man? Nowhere. This industry would be dead, there’d be no Neil Strauss, no Mystery, none of the manly lore surrounding the abilities of any of the giants.
You might be thinking to yourself that approaching women is a very difficult proposition, that nobody can learn it, and you’d be better off not even delving into the realm of something so nerve-racking and frightening initially. But you’d be dead-flat wrong.
Cold approaching is the basis of a lot of PUA-friendly occupations, such as sales, and it’s one of the best skills you can learn. How amazing would it be to approach women whenever you felt like it, know exactly what to do and be able to get what you want out of that encounter? Pretty amazing. So here are some basic tips to make it much easier on yourself once you’ve realized that you want to learn how to approach a girl – follow along and you’ll have no problem.
4 Tips to Improve Your Approaching Skills
1. Look good.
That’s right. Why would you not want to look like you just rolled out of bed if you’re trying to approach beautiful women in the street? The answer is simple – women judge each other based off of their appearances – it’s something society has ingrained in them, so if you’re some schlubby dude rolling off the street, expecting to get instant results, you may be disappointed. Thankfully, there’s help. You don’t have to look like Brad Pitt, but if you have a good sense of fashion and realize that what you walk out the door wearing is a choice – make what you’re choosing to look like interesting. Some people say that she should be able to stereotype you in a word, but guess what? That’s an easy ploy to get you to buy new fashion gear. The biggest one-word stereotype that pops up for women with a guy dressed like a PUA is usually ‘douchebag’. Look the best that you can possibly look.
2. Be able to stop people on the street.
This is another key for being able to approach people, obviously. You might feel uncomfortable with the idea of stopping someone on the street and interjecting into their day, but if you feel at all compelled – don’t be. People don’t have enough excitement in their day. What’s a girl looking for? To make a living, have a bit of fun, and find the man of her dreams? So anything contributing to the last one, even if it’s a bad encounter, she’ll be able to relay it back to her friends as something humorous that happened to her – doesn’t mean you should make it into a bad experience, you just need to make sure you have the gumption to go up to people. That’s the biggest thing. Most people don’t have the wherewithal or inclination to approach strangers – in most cultures, it’s frowned on. But naturally flowing conversation isn’t. Instead of being that guy who seems like he’s going up to people with intent, be a naturally chatty person. Make sure you speak loudly enough that they can hear you – that you’re not approaching from the side, or that you’re in a good position to just turn and open them.
3. Know what to say when approaching women
The thing that the people who are the best at approaching women do – they’ve got a broad base of knowledge about a lot of different topics, and are interesting conversationalists. Think about it. If you’re a stranger, and someone comes up to you, your predominant thought will be, ‘What does this person want?’ If they’re easy-going and the conversation comes naturally, you won’t be wondering what they want, and just enjoy the conversation as it happens. That’s what we aim for – a natural way to keep conversations flowing and easy. If you’re able to do that with strangers, you’re going to be able to do that with anyone. The fortunate thing is, unlike other aspects of game and approaching women, conversation is easy to learn. You can’t practice advanced sexual techniques on everybody you see, you can, however, talk to most people.
4. Practice a lot.
Usually it helps when you have some kind of internal motivation – it’s why club promoters are so good at cold approaching. They need to be, in order to get paid and to keep nights going at nightclubs. Have a motivation in your head and use it when you’re practicing approaching women – be it a better life for yourself, more job opportunities, what have you. If you’re able to keep yourself motivated, and incorporate practice into a daily part of your life, you’ll see results in no time.