How to be the Coolest Guy in the Room

The Secret to Swag

Have you ever seen a guy who just seems to be the life of the party everywhere he goes?…

Of course you have because how could you not notice him?

?It seems like everyone notices him?

Maybe its because he is good looking?

?Maybe he?s a good dancer so he attracts attention on the dance floor?

?Maybe he?s just born with some sort of charismatic super powers?

These traits certainly help get you noticed but they don?t necessarily make you cool.

The truth is that there is actually some very specific things that some men do that make them the main attraction in any situation and it has nothing to do with their looks, what they say, or if they know all the new dance moves.


Regardless of any of that other shit!

We?re gonna break it on down in just one thousand words so that no matter how lame you think you are?





What the Fuck Does it Really Mean to Be Cool.

So first of all, being the main event of any social situation has nothing to do with the shit I listed above.

What it all really boils down to is super simple?


I just saw a friend of mine who is a dating coach on his Instagram story?

He?s in Disney Land right now and in his story, he?s riding what seems to be a lame ass ride at the park.

Not a dope ass roller coaster but like some slow little boat ride?

?And ?It?s a Small World Afterall? is playing loud as fuck through the whole thing?

This seems like such a lame situation that even a small child would think it was lame despite the cartoony song.

Except in the video, my man is jammin the fuck out like he?s at the club to this silly song and having the time of his life?

The result is COOL AS FUCK.

I wished that I could?ve been sitting next to him on that lame ass ride jammin along with him because he looks like he?s having a blast.

Anyone who sees him would feel the same way.

All being cool means is being able to have fun in any situation.

All that anyone really wants is to have fun and if you?re having fun then anybody who tries to make you seem silly for doing it just looks lame?

Nobody wants to be around a Debbie downer?

Everyone wants to be around the guy who can jam out to shitty Disney songs on the slowest lamest ride in the park?

If we remove our cares about the outcome and just have a good time then people will be attracted to us?



Ok cool Van so how the fuck do I make myself the cool guy if I?m not on a lame ride at Disney Land??

I?m glad you asked bruh.


If you?re out at a bar or something and you?re trying to meet girls?


I?m not saying don?t talk to women while you?re out?

?What I?m saying is stop focusing on trying to say the right thing to the right girl and just FOCUS ON HAVING THE BEST FUCKING TIME OF YOUR LIFE?

Make some friends no matter who they are?

?order a shotski for the group?

?have a good fucking time?

I had a friend who is not attractive at all and can?t really dance well but every time we go out, he?s got women throwing themselves at him?

All he does is dance like a buffoon and give no fucks?

This makes the women around him feel more comfortable and then they join in?

The guys who were hanging out with the girls join in?

Next thing I know he?s introducing me to all his new friends and we?re all drinking together and having a good time and exchanging numbers?

It helps a lot to go out in a group of friends so that you aren?t doing it by yourself?

That way you know that if you do break out in a dance party by yourself?at least you?ve got a friend that will? join in?

The shit is contagious and the more people that gravitate, the stronger the gravity becomes.

I personally like to try to find the girl who seems to be having the most fun in the place and feed off of that energy that she?s already creating.

This way we don?t even have to be the trailblazer, we can just tag team with the next coolest person there.

If you see someone grooving on the dancefloor all by themselves, walk right up to them and hype them up like it?s a dance contest and then jump in with em.


Creating Gravity

Nothing is worse than the lame people who don?t want to come out of their shell?

They just suck all the energy out of the room?

What we want to do is pull those people in so that their negative energy isn?t draggin down everyone else?

When you?ve found where the energy is at, pull the lame people into it and encourage them to open up.

That might mean we are encouraging them to have a drink or get into the dance party or whatever.

Now we have literally become the life of the party?



Pro tips:

  • If we are at a club there is usually a girl who has had enough to drink that she no longer gives a fuck and is just having a good time no matter who is watching. There may be lame people around who are thinking ?she?s had too much to drink and needs to chill out?.? They only think that because they?re being lame and are jealous of the fun she?s having.? Gravitate to her, join in and ride the lightning.? It?s like that video of the guy dancing by himself and people are laughing at him.? Next thing you know, everyone has joined in and the only ones getting made fun of are the people who aren?t dancing.


  • Going out with a female friend is best because if a girl is dancing by herself?even if she?s bad at it?everyone will want to join in whereas sometimes if a guy is just dancing by himself and hes bad at it, it?s not as sexy. Bring a female friend along.? Shit she could even be your sister or cousin.? Doesn?t matter.? If you?re having fun then anybody who says you?re lame is just lame themselves.



  • THIS PRO TIP IS GOLD. If you have your phone out on selfie mode and you are recording a video of yourself dancing on the dance floor.? You can pretty much walk up to anybody and put them in the video with you and they will start dancing.? It?s like a magical fun machine.? They don?t know what you?re recording or what it?s posting to but you are having fun and it is on a video that someone is going to see so they don?t want to look lame in the video.? They will groove with you.


Keep cookin fellas

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About Van Bender Van Bender is a writer and coach specializing in becoming the alpha, the art of attraction and hacking the friendzone. Check out my website and subscribe for exclusive content

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