With my recent bout with infidelity, it got me to thinking. We all have these girls that seem so much like the perfect girlfriends… but is it a fraud. I mean think about how easy it really is to get away with cheating on someone. Old Bobby’s been hurt really bad on just one occasion due to a girl’s unfaithfulness. And the catch is… I saw it coming. I ignored the warning signs.. I denied it to myself until I was sitting outside of her house drunk off my ass at five in the morning wondering where she was.

For you guys wondering if your girl is cheating on you, I’m going to give you some of the tell tale warning signs of how to tell if your girlfriend is cheating on you.

1. She avoids eye contact when you ask her what she did last night. We all know all girls by now. We can catch on to the slight differences in their reactions. When you ask her what she did last night… you know how long of a pause there should be before she says “I just stayed in,” or “Me and Michelle went out for a drink.” You also know where her eyes should be. If her eyes won’t make full contact with yours, chances are she was getting slammed silly by some dude on steroids. Yea I hate the image too, but facts are facts.

2. I knew my girl was fucking around when she got nervous when I said I might pop by a bar she claimed she was going to with her friends. In the past my girl always wanted me by her side. She would have welcomed me popping by. But I sensed a nervousness, and her tone of voice changed. All of the sudden concrete plans to go to a certain bar became “well, were not really sure what bar were going to… or how long we’ll be there.” Sure you don’t you skanky bitch…. you’re already counting down the hours till your stuffing your mouth with with new dick.

3. She is suddenly chewing gum more often, wearing different perfumes, straightening her hair, trimming her pubes… all the shit she was too lazy to do for you anymore she has suddenly begun doing again. HAHA and you thought that perfect landing strip leading to her cooch was your new toy. Wrong. Some other guy has got her wanting to be a woman again.

4. Her kissing style changes. This one is noticeable. Everyone kisses different. And after kissing someone for a certain period of time you develop a pattern of kissing. Once that pattern starts changing there is a reason. The new guy is dictating the way she kisses. So yea, if she used to be full out face licker, and now she’s a slow passionate nibbler… Well, you probably already know by now.

5. She gets nervous when you pick up her cell phone. Sure the smart ones erase phone calls and texts but there is always that doubt in their mind that they missed one. You’ll feel that doubt when you pick up her phone. See how quickly she grabs it away from you.

6. She wants sex with you less. She’s worn out from the new guy. You just don’t wet her pussy anymore. The worst is when she does fuck you and her pussy just don’t feel as tight as it used to.

7. Trust your gut. Unless you have a history of be a dillusional paranoid idiot, you’re gut feeling is probably right.