Five Easy Conversation Starters: Cafés
I work from home, which means I work in cafés. I can’t focus at home. Every time I tell myself, “OK, today I’m going to sit at my desk and write,” it never happens. I end up playing Xbox, browsing the web, or taking naps. So I spend a lot of time at cafés.
I’m also girl-crazy — a girl told me that when I was five years old, and I think it describes me pretty well, even today. So I’ve figured out some ways to meet women at cafés. As always, I like to make it easy!
If you see a girl with her laptop and notes out, she is likely studying or doing something work-related. Now the challenge here is that you want to show your interest by being curious about her, but you don’t want to be nosy or distract her if she’s really into what she’s doing. 9 times out of 10, simply asking, “work or school?” will get her to look up and answer with a smile.
The key is to say this as you sit down or walk past – don’t walk up to her, stand there, and ask. This would make her nervous because it looks like you are going to take up a lot of her time with your romantic intention. Just break the ice, sit down, and give her some space. When she answers, there are two more questions to ask: “What are you studying/what do you do?” And, “Do you like it/How is that?” This will get her talking, and you’re in.
This is obvious, especially if she gets one of those crazy caramel frappiato mochatocha chonga drinks. Odds are, that’s her favorite drink, or she’s trying something new. Either way, ask her if it’s good. She’ll probably smile and tell you about her drink. The conversation will die, and that’s OK, because it will be ten times easier to reinitiate when you think of something else to talk about (i.e. something else from this list).
A café is typically filled with customers from the area. That means that she’s probably been to, or heard about, any bar, restaurant, park, or other attraction in the area. You can ask if she’s been to the new Cuban restaurant down the street, and get her opinion of it. If you have already been, you can still ask her, and then tell her how good it is.
Again, this is just another easy way to initiate a conversation without making her uncomfortable, while showing your interest. After this topic, you can easily switch by asking if she’s from the neighborhood, where she grew up, what she does, etc.
Another easy way to start a conversation is by making a statement about yourself. Of course, if you just say something random about yourself, like “I brushed my teeth today,” you will look like a nutjob. But if you crack a joke about yourself, or think aloud about a mistake you made, you will get a laugh and you’ll look charming. The Irish are very good at this.
For example, let’s say you try to get a drink you’ve never had – a caramel choka monga flippiato with sprinkles. As you sit down, you see a cute college girl at the table next to you. You could say, “I only ordered this because I’m comfortable with my sexuality,” or “I hope this doesn’t make me less of a man. Don’t tell anyone you saw me drinking this.”
Another easy way to start a conversation with a statement is to say something really positive – something that will make the other person smile and feel good as well. Obviously you can give them a compliment, but in a café, being direct like that can sometimes backfire.
Talk about what a beautiful day it is (even if it’s snowy, you can talk about how pretty the snow is). Talk about how cool the café is – how you like all the weird decorations and pictures. Say, “I love the coffee here. They make it really dark, which I need. I think if it weren’t for coffee I’d never get anything done.” Going first will make her comfortable reciprocating, and boom, you’re having a conversation. Keep it simple, and say it with a smile!
Find out what type of girl she is. Use these 3 questions to read her mind, and the give her exactly what she wants. Click here to learn the secret to reading her mind.
About Vin DiCarlo Always a rebel with a unique point of view, Vin DiCarlo invented many of the most effective techniques out there, today. His students are some of the most successful and respected in the world. For more information, including how you can get more information - for free - Click Here to watch the Mind Reading Video.