7 Ways to Instantly Be More Likable
We can’t all be the most charming people on the planet, but sometimes (most of the time) it works well to be liked by our friends and strangers alike. If you feel like you could use a little upgrade here are there, here are some ways to become a more likable person pretty much instantly.
You don’t have to hit the nail salon if you don’t want to, but clipping and filing your nails can make a huge difference in the type of impression that you give off. (Especially to women.) Unkempt nails that are dirty underneath seem sort of wild and careless, like you’re out wrestling wild animals to the ground and like to keep some nail length to use as a weapon. Not necessary.
Nothing makes a person look untrustworthy quite like dodgy eyes. This is because people really tend to avoid eye contact or have trouble holding a steady gaze when they’re lying. If it’s shyness coming into play that keeps you from looking right into your boss’ eyes, practice on your neighbor or the barista. Most of the time nothing weird or dangerous happens when you hold someones gaze, it just makes you seem confident, trustworthy, and like you totally know what you’re talking about.
Sure bro it’s sunny out there and you’re undoubtedly super cool, but when you’re wearing your sunglasses people can’t see you. When you knowingly keep the shades on for all of your interactions or meet and greets you’re giving off the impression that you don’t even care. You might prevent some crows feet around the eyes but you won’t have anyone to share your wrinkle free face with.
Sure occasionally you get tired of lugging those arms around and feel like crossing them out of comfort, but you should pay attention to how much you do it. The habit immediately makes you look closed off and guarded whether that’s what you’re feeling or not. Offering up a little perceived vulnerability by keeping your body language open and directly facing the person you’re talking about is going to go a long way.
Crowding someone’s personal space or not knowing when to stop talking can be major turn offs whether it’s at the bar or at work. You can usually pick up on when you’re too close to someone if they start backing away from you. Don’t be that guy who keeps stepping forward to match their retreat, it’s happening for a reason. Clues that your voice is overstaying its welcome might come in the form of people turning their heads away, waking away, giving you a blank face smile instead of responding, or interjecting some random “Okay” or “Uh-huh’s” that don’t make sense. They’re not listening anymore.
Yes, gripes occur all day to everyone, and problem solving is often a necessary step, but endlessly complaining is not appealing. Imagine if a cute girl sat down next to you but opened with how irritating her best friend is. Danger alert. It’s probably just a random bad moment, but that she decided to lead with it makes her seem annoying and full of issues. It’s the same with you.
Genuine smiles can put people at ease, make connections, and make you appear happy and smart. Humans are really good at spotting fake smiles however, and will immediately see through the fakery and label you as untrustworthy. So go ahead and smile when you feel like it, but don’t fluff your social encounters with the tactics of a used car salesman.
About Kate Ferguson Kate Fergus is a Los Angeles local and freelance writer for a variety of blogs and online magazines. When she's not writing, the UC Davis graduate is focused on pursuits of the entertainment industry, spin class, and hot sauce.