5 Ways To Get Better at Opening Girls
Honestly, you can have very mediocre game with girls if you master one essential skill, opening.
For those of who do not know pick up artist lingo, opening is how you approach a girl and the initial impression you give off. This first 30 seconds can be the deciding factor in whether you go home alone crying in the back seat of a cab or end up running around some random girls house naked. Do not get me wrong, other aspects of gaming girls are very important, but before you can ever start practicing these skills you are gonna have to learn how to get people to want to talk to you by becoming the worlds greatest ice breaker.
Now, if you want people to stop what they are doing and to become the center of attention instantly you are going to have ignore many social boundaries while also conquering some common social stigmas. If you sit around a busy bar or club you will see very few guys actually approaching strangers, and the few that are get turned down 90% of the time. This is a pretty shitty success ratio, and scares many men away from approaching all together.
Fortunately, when I was on my journey to become the world’s greatest player I noticed a few things that dramatically increased my success when it came to approaching random googly eyed girls at the bar. Here are the top 5 things that improved my opening.
Before you say wtf, shut up and listen. Bars and clubs are very loud places, the funny thing is when guys approach they use a tone of voice that would only be heard in a library. Picture this. You approach a girl, her eyes light up, you go to say the world smoothest line annnnnnnd……she can’t here you. You say it again, she still does not hear you and is staring at you in confusion. The first 30 seconds of your guys interaction is now not based around attraction, it’s based around confusion and awkwardness. All because you did not use a big boy voice.
Yep, I am really making this simple. YOU HAVE TO SMILE. People at a bar are there to have fun and feel good emotions. I cannot tell you how many guy approach girls with an almost dead expression on their face. Flirting is more about body language and vibing. So when you are not smiling it is going send a lot of mixed signals to the girl and kill attraction. Girls want to have fun and in theory people who are smiling must be having fun. So wipe that chess player expression off your face and cheer the hell up. Or at least fake it.
The look is that face girls give you when you first approach. It usually means one of two things, they are nervous or thinking something along the lines of “Why are you talking to me?” This kills most guys the second they approach. Do not fear though. The look is completely irrelevant. Many hot girls actually do this to test out a guy and see if he is really as confident as he seems. Simply put, the best way to get over this bitch shield is to completely ignore it. If you can endure the initial 30 seconds of awkwardness and overcome it with positivity/fun the look means very little.
This means adding something to the girls night. A lot of girls hate being approached because 90% of the guys walk up and then just drain energy from the group. When you approach a girl, you want to adding to her fun, not taking it away. The quickest way to drain a girls energy its to look to her to make the conversation fun. Remember, when you are approaching girls your goal needs to be to have fun. Get excited, smile, and come off like you are having the best night of your life. This is irresistible to people in general, if you can bring energy and positive emotions to a group, girls they will almost instantly open up to you in hopes that they can get a piece of the awesome.
This is huge. At the beginning of the night, chances are you are not gonna be in the mood to approach strangers. GET OVER IT. You need to start approaching people right away to get your social juices flowing. These approaches might go bad, but with every failed approach you are going to become a little bit more comfortable approaching new people. Within 30 minutes your social energy will be in full swing and approaching people will become one hundred times more natural. Think about it like jumping in a pool, it will shock you at first but after a few minutes you will feel comfortable and be having a blast.
There you go guys, those are my top 5 tips for improving your opening. Next time you are out, consciously apply these and I promise people will start to become more receptive to talking to you. If after all this, they are still being mean it is probably because you smell bad or are uber ugly! =)
About Alex Becker Alex Becker is a dating coach and writer with a huge knowledge base in PUA, psychology, and social dynamics. He currently spends most of his time focusing on teaching college aged men how to naturally improve their success with women. In his free time he enjoys playing guitar, building websites, and his dog Chewbacca.