Is She Playing Dumb, or Is She Actually Dumb?

A friend of mine was once asked out by a guy who she just wasn?t interested in (of course, that didn?t stop her from flirting with him). He said, ?Do you want to go out?? and she replied with ?Where??, pretending she didn?t understand the implication. This, thankfully, caused him to lose his nerve and tell her not to worry about it.

Play acting or reality?

He later tried again, only to be turned down properly. Poor thing – that has to have been one of the most cringe-worthy experiences of his life, and he could have avoided the final part of his humiliation had he realized she was just playing dumb.

Sometimes, women find, it?s easier to just pretend not to get something, if they are reluctant and not sure how to say no, or don?t want to field more questions. On the other hand, there are a lot of idiots out there, and in some cases it?s not an act.

When ??I don?t know what you?re talking about!? means “no”

Generally, if she is just gives a dumb response to suggestive things you say, she is doing so as a way of avoidance. Like the friend I mentioned earlier, she doesn?t want to have to let you down, or deal with the awkwardness of doing so. You may not be sure if she simply didn?t understand you the first time, so if you?re game you could try again.

If she pulls the same trick, then she?s sending you very strong signals that she?s not interested, or it?s too soon for her liking, or she really is dumb. Either way, you?re not getting anywhere with her. If she goes along with your suggestion the second time, she probably actually didn?t understand you the first time.

If you don?t want to put your dignity on the line by repeating yourself, you may never find out whether she was faking stupid or not. Even if you get to know her and she is quite smart, you can?t discount the possibility that she just slipped up. Although, for your ego?s sake, you may not want to know whether she was playing dumb or not.

Should you be worried she?s playing dumb?

Yes, you probably should be worried she is playing dumb.It often means she?s not interested, but is not confident enough to say so. But, as always, there?s the exception. Perhaps she is playing up to the bimbo stereotype as a way of seeming interesting. There are endless films depicting the role of the ?hot bimbo? and celebrities who use this stereotype as a magic carpet to fame- think Paris Hilton, Jessica Simpson and Megan Fox, to name a few. If you suspect that the flirtatious bimbo is not really a bimbo at all, and is acting like one to impress you, test out your hunch by treating her as if she is intelligent and trying to engage in a meaningful conversation with her. You?ll soon find out how stupid she actually is.

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About Natasha Abrahams Natasha Abrahams is a writer and journalism student from Melbourne, Australia. When she is not busy with being a principal writer on Weekendnotes or skipping lectures, she can be found emptying her wallet at the nearest shopping centre. You can read more from Natasha at:

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