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When She Won’t Accept a Drink

Is it a symbolic action when she turns down the drink you bought her, or does she genuinely not want it? There are several reasons why she might refuse it. You need to figure out her reason to find out if you’re wasting your time her or not.

What it means

As I’ve written about before, buying a woman a drink is not the best way of improving your chances with her. That drink is not the difference between getting with her or not. However, it is a conventional way to start a conversation with the lady you’ve been eyeing off, so if you’re not particularly creative when it comes to picking up, you’ll probably do it anyway.

So you’ve ordered her a drink, and she refuses to take it.

She doesn’t trust you

You’ve just met her- she has no reason to trust you. For all she knows, that drink could be spiked. In fact, if she just takes whatever you hand her and downs it without so much as asking what’s in it, you can be sure that she lacks common sense. Next time, have her come with you to the bar so she can see exactly what’s put in it.

She doesn’t want to be bought

She hasn’t made up her mind about you yet, but she doesn’t want to feel pushed into getting with you. Or, even if she is interested, she doesn’t want to feel indebted at all. If she says something like “no, I can buy my own”, then you can be sure that it’s not because she’s not interested, but because she’s too headstrong to accept a drink. Another indicator that this is the case is that she will pursue a conversation with you despite not accepting the drink, and she will try to be in control of the interaction.

She’s not drinking tonight

A totally innocent reason why she rejects the drink you bought her: she’s going sober tonight. If you notice that she never seems to be holding a glass, that’s probably the reason. Upon noticing that she’s not drinking, the last thing you should do is resort to the sleazy man tactic of trying to get her drunk. You also don’t want to seem cheap and desperate by offering to buy her a soft drink.

She’s not interested

Plenty of women will take your drink when they’re not interested because, hey, free drink. It can be hard to gauge her interest from her acceptance or rejection of a drink. One clue that she’s not interested: she’ll laugh when she refuses the drink. This isn’t necessarily her laughing at you because she’s out of your league, it’s because she’s not quite sure how to politely reject you.

To avoid the disappointment you’ll face if she rejects the drink you’ve bought her, there’s one simple thing you can do before you order it: ask her if she’d like one. If she says no, for reasons which are not to do with her interest in you, she will quite possibly tell you her reason.

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About Natasha Abrahams Natasha Abrahams is a writer and journalism student from Melbourne, Australia. When she is not busy with being a principal writer on Weekendnotes or skipping lectures, she can be found emptying her wallet at the nearest shopping centre. You can read more from Natasha at: http://mensstyleandfashion.com/

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